The Hate of His Life
by Aislin of the Shadows
Summary: COMPLETE! When one of Erik's phangirls decides to try and help him get over Christine, she enters him in a contest that makes him date girls until he finds one he can love. However all the contestants seem to be phangirls as well...This can't end well for
1. A Phan's Announcement

Disclaimer: I do not own Phantom of the Opera…oh the things I would do if I did…

(is still dreaming)

What? Should I start the fic now? Right, sorry.

Anyway, this story is going to have some random appearances from me and a few of my friends. If you would like to appear in it too, then please, by all means, you have but to ask. If you are a rabid Erik phangirl, I welcome you into our love circle…which surrounds Erik on all sides…allowing no escape…HAHAHA! YOU'VE PASSED THE POINT OF NO RETURN! Sorry.

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Erik sat musing in his underground lair. Christine had only recently left him for that fop, Raoul. Even worse, everyone now believed him dead. He deplored that Leroux man for the ending he'd put in his novel. Just because it was a more angsty ending didn't mean he had to kill him off! Erik had read the novel, and went on a bit of an Opera Ghost rampage for no reason when he got to the end. The stagehands would be repainting that backdrop for a couple of days at least…

There was suddenly a knock at his door. This puzzled him very much, for two reasons. One, now that Christine was gone, there was virtually no one else who knew this house was here. Two, whoever did know it was here was knocking at the home of a man presumed dead. That's not common.

Erik went up to the door and looked through the tiny peephole he'd installed after opening it to find a pizza delivery guy with a prank address on the step. That Raoul really couldn't do the threats and sly tricks. Compare a croak and a falling chandelier to a pizza boy sent to an I. M. Ugly. How original. Plus he'd had to pay for the seven pineapple and bacon pizzas.

Anyway, as he looked through the hole, he was greeted by a very large brown eye staring back at him. He jumped back. Someone was peeping through his peephole!

He shuddered at the possible nasty connotations of the thought that had just floated across his brain, then sighed and pulled open the door.

Standing on his dirty front step was a rather short girl, obviously the body attached to the brown eye he'd seen. She had long brown hair and pale skin, and was wearing a long, black skirt with her black shirt with bell sleeves, making her difficult to discern against the shadowy background of the cellar. She wore black, oval glasses that weren't very becoming, and was clutching a large, white spiral notebook.

When this mystery girl saw Erik, in all his masked, Phantom glory, she grinned widely and held out her hand. "Hi," she introduced herself. "My name is Aislin. I have a special announcement to make to you."

Erik stared at her. "And how do you know me?"

Aislin smiled wider. Somehow it was kind of disturbing. "Oh, there are lots of girls out there who know you. We're quite dedicated phangirls."

"Phangirls?" Erik had fans?

"Yup. Anyway, it's very important, so could I come in?" Without waiting for an answer, she pushed her way into the little house, leaving Erik dumbfounded at the door.

Aislin glanced around happily at the décor for a while, before settling herself down on a comfy chair near the piano. "Nice. I play myself. I sing too, much better than I play piano. But enough chat. Please, sit." Erik obliged, seating himself on the piano bench.

The girl cleared her throat and began to speak in a rehearsed voice. "Erik No-Last-Name-Submitted, you have been selected to participate in an all new contest, The Love of His Life! In –"

"WHAT?!" Erik jumped up, horrified. Aislin glared at him with a more evil look than he would have thought her capable of, and he fell silent.

"I practiced this over and over, and I'm going to say it right. Now then, in this contest, you will be provided with any number of women willing to throw themselves at your feet for your love. You will take them on trial dates. When you have found one that you believe you truly love, you will be sent off on a romantic vacation to see how the relationship works out. But choose wisely, only one love may be selected. Congratulations on your fateful success!" She grinned at him.

Erik stared back. The Love of His Life? Christine was the love of his life! How…how…

"How did I win this? I never entered…"

"See that's the thing." Aislin smiled and leaned forward thoughtfully. Erik thought she was enjoying being here too much. "The other Erik phangirls and I think you've been spending too much time moping over the loss of Christine. She's gone, she loves Raoul – although _why_ I will never understand. The truth is, Erik, that there are plenty of other women out there, dying for your love. Since we knew you'd never go out to find one on your own, we took it upon ourselves to get you out there! And now you'll have boatloads of phangirls to choose from. _One_ of them has got to make you happy."

Erik was shocked. This girl wanted him to go out and date other women. And what would they think of him? Why would a large group of girls want to date a hideous, masked, murdering monster dubbed The Phantom of the Opera? Hey, after years of hearing it, he wasn't afraid to say it. What really baffled him was the fact that he had fans. Apparently a large following. Fans of _what_, pray tell? What was he going to do?

Well, the excitement of days past was gone with Christine. His opera was completed, and it had been a nasty chore – he wasn't in the mood to start another. So, basically, he had nothing left to keep him here except the moderate thrill of just being the Opera Ghost. And dropping chandeliers _had_ lost its old satisfaction. But still…

"I really don't think I can do this," he said to Aislin. "I mean, it's so soon, and I'm really not a social person…"

"Nonsense! With your voice, you can charm any woman you choose! Now, the limo is waiting on the ground level, and you have about twenty minutes to pack."

A limo? Well, maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all. "Okay, then," Erik said hesitantly. "I guess we could try this. It's not like I have anything better to do."

Going into his bedroom, he realized that, as he did no traveling, he had no suitcase. For lack of anything better to use, he went to Christine's former room and pulled the case off of a pillow. Inside it, he stuffed two more black suits and a spare cape. He took two more masks too, just in case. Back in the days when he'd had only one, it had slipped off while he rowed across the lake and sank, and, well…a certain someone had seen him without it. And subsequently fallen into a certain chamber. A certain chief of the flies. And suffered a certain death.

After packing his violin case into the pillowcase as well (the end of the violin case stuck out awkwardly – Christine's pillows weren't that big), he realized that he didn't have much else he wanted to take with him. He was the Opera Ghost. What more did he need?

So he exited his room with the case in his arms. "I'm ready," he announced.

"Good!" Aislin bounced up from where she'd been sitting at the piano, plunking out random notes that had ultimately taken the form of Masquerade. "Then we'll go now. I'm the coordinator of the contest, so I'll be with you nearly all the time. I love you so much – this is going to be fun!" And she skipped very uncharacteristically out to the waiting boat.

"On second thought," muttered Erik, "maybe I should pack something else." And he grabbed his Punjab lasso as he locked up the house.

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Well, there's the first chapter. I know it's short, I'm sorry. I'm not that good at humor, please don't flame me! I think it's going to turn out well.

Hey, did anyone know that Punjab is actually a word? I noticed that my Word program didn't mark it as misspelled, so I looked it up. It's a region in India and Pakistan, which makes sense, since that's where the Punjab lasso is from. But if I was the only one who didn't know that, then I feel stupid. Anyway, read and review PLEASE!


	2. From Plane to Hotel

Hello again! I'm going to have to update this fic often, as you seem to like it. I feel much more confident about my fic after the nice reviews.

Elven-emma: I certainly hope so. Maybe he can show up randomly in the middle of a chapter…I don't like Raoul at all, so I'd be happy to attack him if I had the chance. I'm sure Erik would be too.

TameranianRaven: Love your name. Teen Titans rocks. Thanks very much!

The Flying Breadstick: You have a cool name too. Beware of Flying Breadsticks! (ducks) Anyway, thank you. I can act very stupid sometimes, but it's hard to write stupidly without the influence of my friends. Sure, you can be in it. The first contestant shows up next chapter, and it's a friend of mine. I'll probably alternate contestants (friend, reviewer, friend, reviewer)…until I run out of friends.

SummerSong: Likewise, you too can look for yourself in future chappies.

LoneGunGirl88: You spelled that right. Your soul is safe. And I should think positive, but my last fic received a few flames, dubbed a 'Mary-Sue.' It isn't really.

Faithoftheforsaken: PADFOOT LIVES!!! (Love Harry Potter…) You too will have a chance at Erik, my phangirl friend…

Lazy.kender19: Oh my gosh, I love your fics, I'm so glad you're reading mine! I think your review was funnier than my whole chapter! Awesome… You probably want to be in it too, right? You didn't ask, but judging from that Xtreme Makeover fic your friend wrote, you'd love to date Erik.

All right then! On to the next chappie! (points the wrong way) What, it's over there? Right, sorry. The next chappie is THAT WAY!

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The smooth limo ride was followed by a half an hour wait for a late flight to Los Angeles, apparently the site of this contest. This was awkward for Erik, as Aislin was one of his biggest newfound phans, and found it difficult to stop staring dreamily at him throughout both the ride and wait. He tried to stare out the window, but no one can avoid the sensation you get when you know someone is watching you. He knew because of the countless times he'd given it to Christine. It was odd the other way around.

At long last, the plane came in, and Erik and Aislin, having first-class seats (A/N: which I have never experienced…), boarded right after the preboarders, with their small children or elderly people. They took their seats in a compartment meant for four, therefore able to stretch their legs out over two seats each.

For Aislin, who had flown countless times before, it was a piece of cake. For Erik, who rarely even left the sanctity of the Opera House, it was a nightmare. When the plane started to taxi, he was fine enough, but as soon as he felt the jolt as the plane left the ground, he attempted to leap to his feet in distress. This was made impossible by the seat belt fastened around his waist. The strap yanked him back down into his seat, where he slumped with a stunned expression on his face, half winded. Aislin, who enjoyed the takeoff and landing most, was looking out the window, and did not notice.

"Sir, you must remain in your seat," said a flight attendant sternly.

Erik grumbled to himself and warily watched the ground below dwindle into the lines and squares of a map.

Once he'd gotten over the initial shock of flying, he began to feel more comfortable. The stern flight attendant who had reprimanded him before returned, with the intention of taking drink orders. Erik ordered a glass of red wine, and, finding that a cocktail on a plane cost four dollars which Aislin refused to pay ("I don't approve of alcohol," she said), he grudgingly switched to iced tea. Aislin happily ordered a Sprite.

He began to enjoy the ride, but wished he had some music. Aislin had a CD player, which he dearly desired to borrow. He plotted to steal it once she fell asleep, which she never did in a twelve hour flight. It was irritating, watching her tap her feet, wave her fingers, and bob her head, all the while going on under her breath, "The Phaaaaaantom of the Opera is theeeeere…inside my mind…" At long last, he pulled out his violin and began to play a few bars of sweet music.

At first the flight attendant wanted to object, but like any other person, she was soon hypnotized by the sensual music of the Opera Ghost. By the end of his song, the whole plane was in a trance. Even Aislin had stopped her CD to listen to the real thing.

A little surprised, Erik figured he had them entranced, so he began another song. And another. No one applauded, they just sat mesmerized, the ice in their drinks melting. One woman had her cranapple juice spilling down the front of her white blouse.

Having fun by now, Erik began a song from his _Don Juan_. The sharp, angry music woke all the listeners up again, and the younger riders cried to their mothers to make the scary music stop.

"Sir, please, stop that!" The flight attendant now was covering her ears. All the passengers were freaking out, with the exception of Aislin who still sat dreaming in the music which had by now stopped.

Erik, more than a little insulted, sat back in his seat cradling his offended violin for the remainder of the ride.

> > > > > > > > > >

Aislin led Erik to another limo waiting outside the airport. "We're staying in the Hilton Anaheim," she informed him. "It's really nice. My family always stays there when we come to LA. There's two gift shops, a great view of Disneyland from our room, and the pool's on the fifth floor." Pulling out two card keys she'd already received, she tossed one to Erik and pocketed the other.

The limo pulled up in front of the glass doors of the hotel, and its two passengers got out. Erik followed Aislin inside, through the glittering, carpeted lobby. It _was_ very nice, vaguely reminding him of the Opera House back home. Two restaurants on the first floor alone, and a small pond in the middle of the room, with a fountain on the other side that he couldn't see. Aislin led him to the elevators. It was obvious she'd been here before.

They rode up to the twelfth floor, where she unlocked the door to their room with a quick swipe of her card. There were two twin beds, a large TV case, a table, two comfy chairs, and a bedside table with two lamps. The closet was on the left, and the bathroom on the right sides when you walk in.

"What, no suite?" muttered Erik, and received no answer as Aislin rushed past him to jump onto a bed.

"I call windowside bed!" she cried as she bounced up and down on her claimed territory. "You can have that one." She pointed at the bed by the wall.

As her luggage was already up in the room, she opened the drawer in the table and pulled out a pencil, which she then applied to the white notebook she'd been carrying since Erik greeted her in the house by the lake. "You might want to get some sleep, she advised. "You have a rather big day tomorrow. Your first date!" She smiled proudly.

"Tomorrow?" Erik stared at her. "Already? Don't I have at least a few days to prepare myself?"

"Nope. The phangirls won't wait that long. It's a good thing they don't know our room number, or they'd be swarming all over you right now." She laughed at Erik's horrified face. "First date tomorrow, no question. It's all planned out. Besides, you're sexy enough without preparation." She flipped a few pages in her notebook, which were covered with names and writing.

Oh, Lord, how many dates did she have planned for him? Erik collapsed on his bed. "I didn't really mean that kind of preparation," he mumbled into his pillow.

"What did you mean, then?" He glanced up to see Aislin standing directly over him, pushing her glasses up her nose.

"Mental preparation…"

"Oh, I know what you mean. We drive you crazy. And you haven't even met all of us." She grinned. "Well, that's the price you'll pay for being incredibly, deathly sexy."

Erik sat up, irritated. "Tell me, how is it that so many girls find me attractive?"

"Oh, I can answer that, I made a list today in school." She fished around in her bag under the bed until she had retrieved a folded piece of paper. "You're a singer, you have a sexy voice, you write cool music, you're totally devoted, you're extremely smart, and you're really strong. That's all on the list. You also have that dark and mysterious thing going that women love, you'd kill for the one you love, your hands are long and sexy, you're a dramatic actor, your evil laugh _rocks_, and you're a mad murderer." She smiled shyly. "That last one might just be me, but creepy guys who kill turn me on."

Erik fell back on his bed again, not used to having all his good points read off a list. "I think I will go to sleep." The last thing he saw was Aislin's back, as she watched the fireworks over Disneyland through their window. The flashing colors and Aislin's low singing lulled him to sleep.

Where he dreamed of insane girls chasing him down the street…oh, the horror…the horror…

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Heehee…I think it's great, now. (Sadly, my cool timechange border didn't come out right...) Lots of this comes from real life. I've stayed in that actual hotel in that exact room more than once, and I really did make a list of Erik's attractions. I was comparing him to Orlando Bloom, because a friend of mine asked me who I liked more if I had the choice. After making a list of both, Erik won. By a lot. Heheh…Read and REVIEW!!!


	3. Attack of the Phangirls

Hi! This is awesome, humor fics garner waaaay more reviews than any other kind! And they're all good. It makes me feel all warm and toasty inside. In a good way.

Danica Enjolras: And I'm in love with your name already! Enjolras is my favorite LesMis character. Wonderful, my list of contestants is growing. I think I really will have to write them in my little white spiral, which, incidentally, is full of Phantom inspired poetry that I've been considering posting in What do you think?

JessicaDwyer: And you shall have it. (titters along with you) I know, I was very proud of the pizza scene.

SummerSong: Heheh. I wasn't exactly sure what to have him order. I considered coffee, being French and all, but in all my years flying, I still don't know if you can order hot tea or coffee on a plane, or I'd have been getting said hot tea for years. I like that crazy straw idea, though. (pictures Erik sipping his tea through the swirly straw) Hahahaha!

Lazy.kender19: Oh, good, you gave me your description. No one else did. That's always helpful. (Hint hint – anyone who volunteered but didn't offer a short description would receive a cyberhug if they did.) I'll keep him from Punjabing you. And actually, the first time I heard Erik's _Don Juan_ (right before I Remember), it did kind of creep me out. Still does if I'm not expecting it to start playing.

Lonegungirl88: Yup, sure thing. Oh, and I'm a huge Orli fan. Just for the record, though, he's actually got black hair. The blond was a wig.

I like to answer my reviewers individually because it always makes me feel good when someone does it to me. It's cool to see

Aislin of the Shadows: Blah blah blah blah.

Not literally, of course. Now that that's over, on to the new chapter!

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Erik woke with a great headache and sore body, due to a bit of jet lag. He rolled over in bed, finding how much more comfortable it was than his coffin back home. But then, coffins weren't built for comfort. It's not like their occupants are going to complain.

At long last he opened his eyes, ready to get up and get dressed.

He was met by the sleeping face of Aislin, lying peacefully next to him. In his bed.

He screamed.

Aislin was jolted roughly awake. "I DON'T WANT TO GO WITH RAOUL!" Erik, more horrified than he'd been in years, shoved her out of the bed, onto the floor, where she landed with a thud.

She looked back up at him. He reflexively covered his face, groping on the bedside table for his mask. Fixing it in place, he glared at her, as she sighed happily. "Oh, it's you, Erik. I was having the most horrible nightmare…"

"WHAT WERE YOU DOING IN MY BED?!" He looked kind of scary – moreso than usual – with fire in his eyes, his hair all messed up, and the tuxedo he'd fallen asleep in rumpled and falling off one shoulder.

Aislin looked at him. "I was cold. You were in your bed, and it was warmer. I didn't want to wake you up."

"Ugh…I need a shower…"

Disgusted, Erik took an unwrinkled tux into the bathroom to bathe and change. The hot water felt good against his face, although he thought there might be something wrong with the plumbing. All through his shower, he heard odd scraping and thumping noises, as if the room was about to come crashing down around his ears. Unnerved by this, he cut his shower short and dressed. Strangely, the noises continued after the water had been turned off.

With his cloak in place at last, he stepped out of the bathroom. He saw Aislin with her back against the door of the room, pushing with all her might. The scraping and thumping noises were coming from the hallway, along with occasional giggles and girlish screams.

"Someone leaked the information to the Internet or something!" The girls behind the door took up a loud chant.

"Erik! Erik! Erik! Erik! Erik! Erik!"

People in nearby rooms began to join the noise, shouting for quiet, ten o'clock was too early to wake up.

"ERIK! ERIK! ERIK! ERIK! ERIK! ERIK!"

Aislin hollered over the din without opening the door.

"GO AWAY! ONLY ONE OF YOU IS GOING TO SEE HIM TODAY! GO WAIT IN THE LOBBY OR THE CONTEST IS CANCELED! I'M NOT KIDDING!"

Grumbling and kicking the door in scorn and disappointment, the crowd of phangirls eventually dissipated. After five minutes, Aislin carefully opened the door a crack, with the chain on. Only one girl waited hopefully outside.

"Who are you?"

"My name's Hilary, and I just want to see him for a mom –"

"You can see him on your date, we'll get to you eventually. Now go away. We'll get to all of you soon enough."

"That's not soon enough!" But Aislin snapped the door in poor Hilary's pleading face.

She then turned to Erik, quite drained. "Now do you see how popular you are?" He nodded dumbly. "Anyway, your first date is in half an hour with…Kat Solis. She'll be waiting for you downstairs in the lobby, at a table in that restaurant."

"Which one? There were two."

"You'll know. Considering you wear nothing but that tux, I figure you're ready, so you ought to get going now. All expenses paid by the contest people."

"Now? But I have half an hour!" But Aislin was already pushing him to the door. However, she went out into the hallway first, where Hilary sat by the wall, rocking back and forth, singing to herself.

"And do I dream again…For now I find…The Phantom of the Opera!" She spotted Erik and leapt to her feet, but at Aislin's evil glare, she slunk down the hall to the elevators. "I was…just leaving."

When poor Hilary was out of sight, Aislin pushed Erik to the elevators as well. "Try to keep your temper, and have a good time!"

"Are you kidding?" But before he knew what was happening, he was in the elevator, and Aislin's waving face disappeared as the door closed.

He rode down twelve floors, standing awkwardly with two girls in towels and swimsuits who had gotten on on the tenth floor and rode down to the fifth – the pool level. He'd have to be sure to check out the pool. He didn't have any time at all back home to enjoy the sun. But meanwhile, he avoided looking at their bikinis, while they stared at his mask.

He warily exited on the first floor, but the hoards of phangirls seemed to have disappeared for the day. Now, why did Aislin say that he'd know which restaurant he was supposed to go to?

The visible half of his face turned very red when he found out why. In the restaurant to his left, he saw a girl slightly younger than Aislin was standing on a chair waving a sign in the air. He had virtually no choice but to skulk over to her, waving her "OPERA GHOST" poster.

Happily she hopped off the chair and offered him her hand. "I'm Kat."

"Right." Erik briefly shook her hand. "What are we doing now?"

"Well, Aislin – being the contest coordinator (A/N: And the authoress…), she picks the places for our dates. Your dates. And apparently she wanted to go easy on you the first day, so we're just having breakfast in the hotel restaurant." Erik sighed and sat down.

He wondered for a minute why Kat was still standing, before he realized that she wanted an actual date. Grudgingly, he got up and pulled her chair out for her, appearing a real gentleman based on his clothes, though his expression proved otherwise.

Kat ordered pancakes, and Erik inquired after crêpes. He didn't get out much back home, and a good French dish sounded appealing. But, being in LA, there were none available, so he opted for eggs. Something he was used to. He was already sick of his first food choices never being available.

It didn't start off well. Kat was a phangirl of a different sort. She wasn't content to just sit and worship him while lost in a world of dreams, like Aislin. She wanted to touch his cloak, his mask (which he was sure to keep on, so he had to lean over the table), his tux, _him_. That was where he drew the line.

Then she tried to ask him endless questions. "What's it like living under the Opera? Is Raoul really a fop? Of course he is. Is Christine horrible? Was it fun dropping the chandelier? Is it hard rowing the boat to your house? How big is the lake? Do you ever swim in it? Did anyone ever perform your opera? Will you sing me something?"

Erik tried to answer all her questions as best he could, but he flat out refused to sing her something in the middle of the restaurant. It was more of an indoor café, so he'd be singing for all the lobby to hear. Not that that was a bad thing, he just wasn't in the mood.

Kat pressed him. "Come on, just one song. Music of the Night?"

"No."

"Angel of Music?"

"Technically I'm not even in that one."

"The Mirror, then."

"No."

"Sing the title song with me then?"

"No."

"At least do that scene where Christine pulls your mask off. Damn you!" Erik jumped up, startled, before he realized that she was performing the scene herself. "You little prying Pandora! You little demon…" As if struck by a sudden idea, she abruptly reached across the table to pull off his mask herself. Erik jerked away, but just a moment too late. Kat barely pulled it, and the porcelain shattered on the floor.

And that, my friends, is why you pack spare masks.

Shocked, Kat stared at the shards before going to pick up a few to keep as souvenirs. Meanwhile, poor Erik stood stock-still desperately covering his face. The fuss Kat had caused with her singing meant that now every person on this level of the hotel had turned to see what was going on, and every curious face wanted to see what Erik had to hide. He had had enough of this one. He turned to stalk back to the elevators.

Kat ran after him, her pockets clinking with porcelain pieces. "Wait, we're not done here."

"Yes, we are!" Erik's voice was muffled. He pushed her out of the way and kept walking. He heard her shouting angrily behind him, and he didn't listen. That is, until something hard hit him at the base of his neck.

"OW! What was…?" He stared confusedly at a whole potato lying on the floor. "Did you just throw a POTATO at me?!"

"Yes!" Kat did not look happy. Her reddish hair was thrown all in front of her face.

"Where did it come from?" Erik knew it would leave a mark, but he was wondering more why a potato had been her choice of weapon.

And when she emptied her bag all over the floor, and ten or twelve potatoes rolled over the floor, Erik high-tailed it to the elevator before she could hurl any more.

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Well, that was a nice long chapter. Heheh. Read and review!


	4. Swimming Can Only End Badly

I get to update every day! Yay! (is happy) Okay, reviewer time!

Kianra: I love your fic, I almost stole your singing in the elevator thing, but figured I should stick to my own ideas. I can totally see Erik singing the title song over the elevator music. And when Hilary is outside his door singing and he goes, "Sing my angel of music!" That was awesome. Anyway, you shall be in it. Thanks for the description. A cyberhug for you! (hugs) Heheh…Sprite…I wish I had known that – I would have put it in chapter two.

Lazy.kender19: I thought I only called you poor Hilary once? It was because I felt bad about being so harsh on you for hanging around the door. And my friend Kat's trademark is…throwing potatoes. It's a long story…e-mail me if you'd like to hear it! (grin) And I'm honored that you'd risk getting in trouble to read my little fic. You know, since you gave me your description in the first place, you deserve one too. (hugs)

JessicaDwyer: You sent me a lovely little descrition…I already have ideas of what to do with you…Cyberhug! (hugs)

SummerSong: Heheh…maypole… I love that last idea of what to do with the fop, I'm totally going to use it… Another description! (hugs)

Faithoftheforsaken: Thanks! And last but not least, one for you. (hugs)

Yay! Cyberhugs all around! Anyway, here's the next chapter – one of you guys! As I don't know most of you personally, I'm going to invent your personalities as I go along. And this one's a little…OOC.

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Erik looked awful when he got back upstairs. Aislin pulled open the door to see him staring angrily back at her with half his face. "So…how did it go?"

"She threw a potato at me."

Aislin laughed. "Yeah, well, that's Kat for you. Well, your next date was scheduled for tomorrow, but that one was so short, we could probably fit it in today. And before Erik could protest, she had picked up the phone.

"Hello? Yeah, we've got a load of time left…go ahead and send up the next girl…Yeah, send her up here." She hung up.

"And why can't we wait until tomorrow?" Erik had retrieved one of his spare masks and fitted it to his face.

"Think if it this way – if we fit as many together as possible, the phangirls get to see you sooner, and you get finished with the dates sooner. Everybody wins!" She grinned.

Erik had to agree with this, even if it meant him more pain and embarrassment at the moment. Then before he could even comment on it, there was an excited knock at the door.

"Already?" he said incredulously.

"Well, the phans want nothing more than to see you, so chances are they're all hanging around really close by. Like that girl this morning." Aislin pulled open the door.

Behind it stood a rather short girl, the height difference magnified by the fact that Erik was so tall. The striking thing about her was that she had curly, red hair. Not the reddish color Kat had had, but really _red_ hair. Erik was put in mind of the girl from Charlie Brown, with the naturally curly hair. She looked…extremely happy to see him. It was understandable, but it looked like her smile might be hurting her a bit.

"Erik, this is Summer. Signed up over the Internet as SummerSong. Let's assume that Song is her last name."

Erik studied this new girl. "She doesn't look Asian."

"Not that kind of Song. Song as in, 'Sing my angel of music.' You ought to get along really well."

Summer tilted her head to one side and asked, "Where are we going?"

"It's still Erik's first day of this, so you aren't going far. I've arranged a visit to the pool on the fifth floor. I even got you both swimsuits." Aislin happily held out a plastic bag to Summer's face lit up. Swimming…with Erik…

The Opera Ghost, however, was less than pleased. True, he'd planned on going to the pool, but not on one of his dates. "I'm _not _changing into a swimsuit with this girl. Or any girl for that matter. Do you think I'm stupid enough to dare to take my shirt off around these crazy phangirls?"

"I was kind of hoping you were." Summer looked rather crestfallen.

"It's no problem," said Aislin. "Erik, change in the bathroom. I'll leave, Summer, you can go ahead and change in here." She exited the room to give them both some privacy.

Erik took his suit out of the bag and went into the bathroom, locking the door. It wasn't as if she had gotten him a Speedo or something. He shuddered. (A/N: I shuddered. Speedos scare me.) It was a pair of ordinary trunks. They were even black. He tried them on.

He was almost sorry to say that he was a little proud of how he looked. The swim trunks didn't exactly go well with the mask, but his body looked…well…sexy. Aislin's word was the only one that came to mind. And he had great muscles in his arms – he'd never noticed. Probably from all the rowing in the boat on the lake. Still, a little self-conscious, he put on a white bathrobe before he left the bathroom.

Summer's suit was a simple one piece, black as well. Apparently Aislin hadn't wanted to presume too much when she bought them. She took two towels and opened the door. Erik went out first.

Aislin was nowhere to be seen, so Summer pulled Erik to the elevators down the hall. They got in one, and stood waiting as it descended to the fifth floor.

Summer stood quietly next to him. Erik watched her warily. At least she seemed sane enough so far. No potatoes.

The elevator stopped, and they went up to the pool. There was one large pool, with the usual shallow and deep ends, and four small hot tubs. Kids splashed in the shallow ends, while older people paddled in the deep end, or floated on inflatable mattresses. A little lost, Erik simply took a seat on a large reclining chair. He didn't even remove his robe.

Summer stood disconsolately beside his chair. "Aren't you going to swim?"

"I don't swim publicly."

"For the record, you don't do anything publicly." And she walked away.

Erik couldn't believe it. Was he so lucky? Did one date actually leave of her own accord? Still wondering, he leaned back in his chair.

There was a large splash, and Erik was suddenly very wet.

And there stood Summer, a large bucket in her hands, and Erik dripping with the water she'd dumped on him. "There. You're wet. Now let's go swimming."

Erik stood up, his sopping hair in his eyes. He opened his mouth, raising his hand as if to get extremely angry.

And Summer pushed him into the pool.

He wasn't exactly sure what had happened, except that he was now in seven feet of water, his robe weighing heavily in the water, and a ten-year-old boy had just careened into his leg underwater. Grinning proudly now, Summer leaped into the pool beside him. "CANNONBALL!!!"

So much for being sane.

A very wet Summer clung to the wall next to Erik. "Race you across the pool!" And she took off toward the shallows.

He didn't know if he wanted to swim or if he was just mad out his head. All he knew was that he was removing his floundering robe and letting it sink to the bottom of the water, chasing Summer down to the other end of the pool.

He crashed into her.

"Ow…" He rubbed his shoulder, which he'd driven into her back. "Why…?"

He realized why.

He'd actually fallen for all her trickery! No, I won't get in the pool, and he let himself be pushed in. No, I won't take the robe off, and he'd left it in the other end. No, I won't swim with you, and he'd let her lead him into it!

Was she smart, or was he stupid?

Triumphantly, Summer pounced on him in the water. And Erik learned that day what it is all phangirls wish to do – jump on a half-naked, wet Erik in the middle of a swimming pool. It wasn't much of a learning experience then, however, as he was underwater and couldn't breathe.

One hand on the mask, and the other pushing Summer away as best he could, he struggled to reach the surface. Only when Summer felt that she needed air did Erik find the opportunity to splash out of the water. He gasped for breath, and turned to Summer.

"Are you trying to _kill_ me?"

She stood innocently in the three feet of water. "Not really, no."

Exasperated, he climbed out of the pool. Then, on a second thought, he turned around and backed away slowly, so he could still see Summer waving goodbye from the pool.

"It was fun! Call me!"

Like heck he'd call her.

He grabbed another towel from the guy at the gate of the pool, wrapping it around him as he walked. The first one nailed him with a potato, and this one tried to drown him. This could only end badly.

He slumped weakly against the wall of the elevator on the way up, and, as Aislin still hadn't returned from wherever she'd gone, he changed out of his suit into the previous, wrinkled one and all but fell onto his bed, crashing after the morning's ordeal. It was barely two o'clock, and he was completely drained. But then, near death by phangirl-induced drowning could take a lot out of an Opera Ghost.

He dreamed fitfully of his cozy little house by the lake, with the coffin and the piano and little dancing girls in the Opera just waiting to be terrified.

………………………………

Hm. I'm not too proud of that one. Well, I hope you liked it! Oh, and if The Flying Breadstick is still out there, I'd like to know your real name, or at least a functionable (hey, that's not a word, I could have sworn it was) nickname. I'd feel weird having Erik date the…flying breadstick. Of DOOM! Sorry. Anyway, read and review!


	5. What did you say?

Tomorrow's my last day of school, so I'll be able to update faster. (I almost didn't do today's chapter.) Reviewers!

SummerSong: Glad you liked it. I'm glad you got the Asian bit…I was afraid no one would notice the pun. O.O You're married? Wow…wonder what my audience age range is?

Gir: Invader Zim! Heheh. Well, I'm glad you like it, but everyone around here kind if _is_ a fangirl…you might not want to shoot when you're so outnumbered. And I like the name Erik! With a K.

Kianra: Yes, I'm doing that right now. I have dedicated fans! (is happy)

Hilary: Yes, please, do tell me when your e-mail is fixed. I should like to keep regular contact. We could be, like, keyboard-pals!

Phoenixthemenace: Yes, you can be in it, and you are welcome to make your character up. In fact, it would help, especially because you seem to have the same real name as the character in my third chapter. O.O

Kojinka: You also may be in it. If this keep up, people, this fic could be really long. And I think you have a nice name. Gina…Gina…Gina…(is smacked by Kojinka) Ow. Sorry.

Han Futsu, Anti Normal: Heheh. Hilary freaked you out. Awesome. And I haven't met any sane girls yet. I don't see any in the long line stretching around the block and back.

Anyway, here is the new chapter. Yet another of you people. As I have more reviewers than friends who are phangirls.

……………………………………..

He awoke hours later when Aislin poked him in the side…over and over again. Only after about twelve pokes did he realize what was going on and snap awake.

"What time is it?" Erik asked groggily.

"It's ten. I thought you might want some dinner. You haven't eaten since your little breakfast date with Kat twelve hours ago."

Erik's stomach rumbled loudly. Okay, so he was hungry. "Yeah, I could do with some food."

"Good. You can eat with your next date."

He groaned. "This is the third one today! What happened to only one a day?"

"As long as you manage to whiz through these dates at the speed of light, we're going to line as many up together as possible. This'll probably be your last one of the day."

"Oh thank heaven."

Aislin pulled him up off the bed and pushed him into the bathroom yet again. He was beginning to be very familiar with this room. "Now change into your other tux and put your cape on. You're meeting her upstairs in twenty minutes.

"Why upstairs?" Erik called, as Aislin snapped the door in his face, after throwing his clothes into his arms.

"There's another restaurant up on the top floor – a steak restaurant," she replied through the door.

Erik raised an eyebrow. "Nice," he commented. And in twenty minutes he was traveling in an elevator again, going up this time, to the restaurant on the top floor of the Hilton Anaheim.

Problem was, that in twenty minutes he ought to have already been up in the restaurant starting in on his appetizer.

His next date noticed this.

A girl with brown hair streaked with gold down to her shoulders stalked up to him right away, her bluish gray eyes blazing. To Erik's surprise, she came right up and slapped the visible half of his face.

"You're late!" She tapped her foot impatiently, and then, out of nowhere, broke into a wide grin. "Well, let's go to our seats. I already ordered us drinks." This active girl led the bewildered Phantom to a table for two next to the window.

The window stretched all the way around the room, pretty much comprising all of the wall, giving a lovely view of the ground below. All of Anaheim was at their feet. Erik felt very relieved that he spent so much time in the catwalks above the Opera stage, and therefore didn't get vertigo.

Erik took his seat across from the girl, who was now leaning dreamily over at him. "And you're my date for tonight, are you?"

"Well, obviously!" said the girl, a little indignantly. "My name is Breanna, and your name is Erik!" She smiled proudly. "And I got you a drink, so you can go ahead and start on it."

He looked down at…a strawberry smoothie. Not a soda, or some tasteful wine, but a smoothie. Why a smoothie? But Breanna was already sipping hers contentedly.

He wished she'd kept drinking the stupid smoothie. As soon as the straw came out of her mouth she was talking. It was like Kat all over again, except Breanna seemed content to carry on a conversation with herself.

"So you're from Paris right? Of course you're from Paris, that's where the Opera Garnier is. What's it like there? I bet it's really nice. I've never been to the opera. I went to a musical once. Oh, of course, it was _The Phantom of the Opera_! Is it cool to have a musical written about you? Do you think they portray you well in the musical? I think the musical version of you is cooler. Although now that I meet you I like you better in person. Have you seen the musical? Is it weird to watch yourself on the stage? Oh, have you met Andrew Lloyd Webber? Did you have to meet him so he could write the music? Do you ever sing the songs from the play? Will you sing one now? No, probably not, we wouldn't want to disturb the people in the restaurant. Although I'm sure they'd love to hear you. Did you know that some people have never heard of you? I say to them, 'I'm going out with Erik tonight,' and they say, 'Who?' I think it's really quite pathetic. Anyone who hasn't heard you sing is extremely deprived. Anyway – are you okay?"

Erik sat in a bit of a daze. He had gotten lost somewhere around the words 'Opera Garnier.' He didn't know where the rest of her speech had gone. He was still processing.

Breanna waved her hand in front of his face. "You don't talk much, do you? Everyone tells me that I talk a lot. When –" Erik clapped his hand over her mouth.

"Please stop…just for a minute." At that moment, the waiter came along to take their orders. Gratefully, Erik ordered a filet mignon and, for some reason, Breanna got a salad.

"We're at a steak restaurant. Why are you getting a salad?"

"I'm on a diet. I eat only small meals in order to lose weight. No one thinks I'm fat, but I'm doing it just to be safe. Besides, I'm not sick or anything. I just –" Erik hit his head against the table a couple of times.

The meal came, and he had an extremely hard time trying to get Breanna to shut up.

"Do you have any pets? I had a dog once, but he ran away. I never figured out what happened to him. Oh, you wrote an opera right? I tried to write a song, but I couldn't think of a melody. I can't read music anyway. What's your opera about? Wasn't Don Juan a pervert or something? You shouldn't write a play about perverts. People might get ideas."

"Okay, that's enough." Erik stood up. "You've talked my ears off for the past half an hour, and they're already starting to hurt. I think I'm going to go ahead and leave now." He walked away.

Breanna looked kind of confused. "Why? I like talking, you should try it more. Don't leave, I was just starting to have a good time. Aw, Erik, don't leave!" And he came back.

"Oh, I knew you wouldn't leave me alone. Now sit down, let's finish our meal."

Erik picked up his plate. "I'm just taking my meal with me. "I'm still hungry, but I have to get out of here." And carrying his steak before him, he walked out of the restaurant, past a waiter stammering that he couldn't take the plate with him. Which he did anyway.

He wasn't going to finish a date with that hopeless chatterbox. He took his meal up to the room, where Aislin sat listening to her Phantom CD. She looked at him, and pantomimed, "Didn't go well?"

Erik shook his head, and motioned with his hand, "Talk, talk, talk." Then he sat down at the table to eat his meal on stolen dishes in peace, just like back at the Opera House.

…………………………………

That one was shorter than the others, but I think it was funny. And now Erik will start to go to more interesting places. Read and review!


	6. Hooray for Hollywood!

Sorry I didn't update yesterday, I had lotsa stuff to do.

Mandy the O: 'Hi pervert!' HAHA! Funny. I'm glad you enjoyed it. And sure, you can be in it. Cyberhug for the description! (hugs)

SummerSong: O.O You're right, I wasn't born yet. But two years later, I was all, "HI!" And the world was never the same. No piccy though…(is sad) Do photos show up on reviews? (apparently not) Congrats anyway! And tell your husband that he needn't worry – Erik doesn't seem to feel like really getting with anyone right now. Heehee.

LoneGunGirl88: You don't attack and you're not insane. (writes it down for future reference) Got it.

Kojinka: Okay. I'm going to use real (or realistic) names wherever possible.

Han Futsu, Anti Normal: That is a turn on. But quickly, tell me this…(feels stupid for asking) …Are you a girl? DON'T HURT ME!

FaithoftheForsaken: Oh, good, I thought I was going overboard with the 'talkative.' It was just so funny!

Softiful: Glad you liked it! (munch)

FaithoftheForsaken's friend: You can be in it. (I like black clothes too!) Cyberhug for the description! (hugs)

Phantomraver: Sure, you can be in it. I'm popular! (is happy)

Danica Enjolras: I was just going into my e-mail to look for your desc! Weird! Anyway, a cyberhug waits for you upon your return. And it's too bad you're going on a trip now, of all times, if you know what I mean. (wink)

MortRouge: Wow. That is officially the longest desc ever. Cyberhug! (hugs) Look for yourself in some future chappie.

Kianra: Make your reviews as long as you like, I love them. They make me HAPPY! I'm glad you liked the steak bit. I myself thought that was really funny. I'M A FAVORITE FIC!!! Yay!

Eat-drums: Yay! You can be in it, yes.

Wow. That took up a whole page in my Word program. New chapter! And now we venture out of the hotel! Dun dun DUN!

THEDOTTEDBORDERDOESN'TWORK

Erik woke in the morning feeling rather rested. To his surprise, he was met by a large round table squeezed between the beds, covered in plates and dishes.

"Room service!" called Aislin happily. "You'll need to eat for today, because you're not staying in the hotel anymore."

"Imagine that." Erik pulled the cover off a plate of eggs and bacon and started to stuff his face. Then, without waiting for Aislin's directions or shove, he went straight to the oh-so-familiar bathroom to wash and change.

"Where are we going today?"

"Today," began Aislin, "we have a bit of a drive to our date destination, so we're bringing three girls with us, and you'll date them all in one place."

"I'm dating THREE girls at once?!" And he thought things couldn't get any worse.

"No, no, you're dating three girls _today_. Only one at a time. The other two will wait with me until it's their turn. Erik sighed with relief.

"Now come on, they're waiting downstairs. We've got a rental car…er – van. Um…you can have the front seat." She smiled sheepishly. "I'm not going to make you squeeze into a backseat with three phangirls." Erik smiled thankfully, and started downstairs with Aislin. "Are you coming?"

"Yup. I need to monitor what's going on from a relatively close range. And we're technically going to another city."

Erik raised an eyebrow. "What city?"

Aislin smiled a little slyly. "Hollywood."

> > > > > > > > > > >

Waiting in the lobby were three girls all talking together excitedly. One had wild, curly, blond Medusa hair with pale, rather glowy skin, and looked about Aislin's age. The second girl was about two inches shorter, but looked a little older, with strawberry blond hair and twinkling blue-gray eyes. The third girl (who I have no idea what she looks like, as I have no desc) stood beside the others, with semi-long brown hair, looking a good deal calmer than the other two, but excited all the same. Aislin led Erik up to them, and they all started to cheer.

Aislin shushed them. "Erik, this is Danica Enjolras, Jessica Dwyer, and…LoneGunGirl88, who also signed up over the Internet and therefore, has no real name in my notebook. However, as I had the good sense to check her userlookup on FanFiction, I know her name is Kimberly." She pointed proudly to each of the girls, who waved as they were introduced.

Erik looked at Danica for a while. "Enjolras? Isn't he that leader guy from Les Misérables? Doesn't that technically make you married? How can you date me and have his last name at the same time?"

Danica pushed her blond hair back and replied, "Experienced fangirls can be in love with all sorts of characters at the same time. Besides, you don't have a last name."

"I'm not married, Erik!" piped Jessica, her eyes flashing happily. Kimberly, however, remained silent. Judging from her name and her attitude at the moment, Erik thought she seemed kind of dangerous. He didn't think this was one to fling a potato at him, though.

Aislin clapped her hands. "Everyone into the van outside! It's waiting!" And the girls rushed to the doors, with Erik and Aislin following at a slower pace. Aislin sat in the middle seat with Kimberly, while Danica and Jessica took the backseat. Erik got his shotgun.

The drive to Hollywood lasted a couple of hours, spent singing loudly to the driver's irritation. The odd thing was that Erik began to enjoy himself. So far these girls seemed sane enough. After an hour's drive, the four girls had him singing along with them. Aislin had brought along her Phantom CD, and Erik sang along with it, to great cheers from the girls, who, incidentally, were completely silent during Music of the Night, but all sang Christine's parts as loud as possible.

"THE PHAAAAANTOM OF THE OPERA IS THEEEERE…INSIDE OUR MINDS!"

"WOULD YOU ALL SHUT UP?!" The driver of the van jerked around and screamed for silence, as he was trying to drive. He nearly hit a ten-year-old boy on a skateboard when he turned around.

There were ten minutes of sheepish silence.

"POINT OF NO RETURN!" cried Jessica.

And the CD started up again, and Erik quite happily took up his part again, with the girls once again singing as Christine. The van driver muttered angrily to himself as he continued.

The two-disc CD set had finished playing, and someone had stuffed Les Mis into the player (probably Danica) when they saw the Hollywood sign. The girls cheered, and even Erik smiled.

The driver dumped them out on the corner of Hollywood and Vine with their CDs, and sped off as if afraid they would pursue. Erik and Kimberly looked nervously after it.

"He'll be back at eight," said Aislin cheerfully, seeing their faces. "He has to, or he doesn't get paid."

The group headed to a little café on a nearby street, where they found a table to sit at. Aislin settled down, pulling a laptop out of her bag, in which she also had some CDs, DVDs, a book, and a drawing pad. "I'll be waiting here with whichever two girls aren't with Erik. When the two on a date are done, they'll come back here and another girl will go out with our beloved Phantom. The first one is…" She consulted her white spiral. "Danica Enjolras. Here is your destination." She handed the excited Danica a slip of paper with an address on it. "Have fun!"

…………………………………

Sorry to leave you there, and sorry it was so short. Danica's actual date is the next chapter. And I'm sorry if the reviews take up so much space – this one was a record. I just like to give each reviewer the satisfaction of knowing I appreciate their comments. Because I DO! Now send me some more!


	7. Oh, no, not you!

I have news! My sister got passes to an early showing of the Phantom movie tomorrow! Two days before the opening! I'm going to be there in my female version of Erik's costume (minus the cape – the only one I have is blue), with Christine's engagement ring on a chain around my neck and Erik's gold ring on my finger. Mask and all! I even bought new black pants and white gloves especially for the occasion! I can't wait!

MiMi: When you say a small cameo, is the subliminal meaning, "Let me have a date, oh please, oh PLEASE"? Or do you really only want a small appearance? Because I already have ideas… Anyway… (hugs for the desc)

Han Futsu, Anti Normal: Yeah, it was your name. I just wasn't sure. And that story's…creepy. And I hate that Butler guy…I'm sorry, but his voice just isn't fit for the Phantom. When I first heard it, I just thought I was being biased because I love Michael's voice so much, but my mom listened too, and she doesn't like it either. Luckily, my two-disc CD set is the original cast recording.

Phantomraver: I'm so glad you enjoyed it. (hugs) And you don't have to reveal your real name – make one up if you like. That's what I do. Although all my friends call me Aislin – it may not be my real name, but my nickname is just as good.

Lazy.kender19: Zifnab-whatsit? I don't normally do IM, so I can't contact you on that. (is sad) But if ever your e-mail gets fixed, be sure to tell me. At any rate, I consider us web friends now! Yay! Hope you can get this chapter up. And I'm updating right now. (holds hand at the level of her eyes)

MortRouge: Ooh, French. OOH, Paris! OH! Red Death – THAT"S what your name means! I knew I knew it, I just couldn't remember. Hana – that's Japanese for 'flower.' 'Je deteste l'orthographe…' What do you hate? I don't know that last word, in English or French. Oh, yay, I'm a favorite author! And I'm highly recommended! Thank you!

Kojinka: (hugs) Don't hurt yourself, we all forget stuff.

Eat-drums: (hugs) And I shall check out your profile for other info.

Next chapter! This Hollywood bit is like…the second season, if this were a TV show. There's 'The Love of His Life' and 'The Love of His Life: Hollywood Edition!' Enjoy!

…………………………………………………..

Danica clung to Erik's arm all the way down the street. He tried to pull himself out, like taking off a jacket, but had no luck. His good mood was slowly slipping away. Apparently small groups of phangirls were easier to control. Then he considered that for a moment. He decided there was only one at the moment.

"Where are we going?" he asked.

Danica checked the slip of paper Aislin had given her. "Some theater place. I think we're going to see a movie."

That was simple enough, thought Erik. He just had to sit through a movie for a couple of hours with her, and then he could hand her back to Aislin. He hoped it was a good movie.

"Here we are," said Danica. "This is the address."

They were standing before the famous Mann's Chinese Theater. (A/N: Forgive me if I got the name wrong – it's been a couple of years since I was there.)

"We're going _here_?" gasped Erik. "What are we seeing?" This was the theater for movie premieres! What were they here for?

"I think it's a special showing. Only us, and a movie that's not normally here."

Danica and Erik went into the theater. (A/N: Which the authoress has never been to, so bear with her as she makes stuff up.) It was a large room, all done in red carpeting, with a red curtain hiding the screen. Hundreds of wooden seats filled the floor and balcony level. Torch-like lights were spaced out along the walls.

Being the only two in the theater, Erik headed to the prime seats in the very center of the room. Danica, however, stayed where she was.

"Where are you going?" she demanded.

"I'm getting a seat," Erik replied drily.

"Not there," she said exasperatedly. "We should sit in the front row!"

"We have the whole theater to select from, and you want the worst seats in the house?"

"I like the front row. Everything's really big and no one blocks your view."

"No one's _here_ to block our view! And in the front, you have to crane your neck to see and it hurts."

"But I always sit in the front!"

"It gives me a headache."

"The front is the best place to sit in the whole theater," Danica said stubbornly.

"Fine, sit in the front," Erik snapped. "But I'm staying right here." He plopped down in his center seat, folding his arms and crossing his legs, showing no intention of moving.

Danica paused for a moment. As sitting in separate seats kind of defeated the purpose of a date, she stalked over and sat next to Erik, sulking. The Opera Ghost smirked.

The theater grew dark, and the curtain pulled open. Apparently the theater wasn't reserved only for them, because two other people crept in late when it was dark, and took seats near the back. The screen showed a dusty old room full of junk, and a few people standing around shrouded object. An old man stood before a podium and spoke to the others.

"Lot 666 – a chandelier in pieces…"

"No WAY!" Erik leaped out of his seat. _This_ was the movie they were watching?

Danica shushed him, and he settled down to watch himself on screen.

He watched the Opera House change back into its old, grand self, and he witnessed the rehearsal for Hannibal.

"Who's playing Carlotta?" he whispered. "She looks kind of…weird."

"It's Minnie Driver," replied Danica.

During The Mirror sequence, Erik gaped at Emmy Rossum's voice. "That's not how Christine sings! She sings ten times better than that! And Christine's blond."

"Really? I always thought she had black hair. Funny." And then Christine was pulled through the mirror to the Phantom's lair.

And Erik got a lovely view of Gerard Butler as himself.

"That's me?" Erik stared, contemplating Gerry. As he began to sing, Erik made a face. "Don't I sing better than that?"

"Most phans think so, but they went and cast that Scottish dude anyway. There was a big organization on the Internet campaigning to get Michael Crawford to do it, but it didn't work."

They watched the rest of the movie in near silence, while Erik made random comments on things he felt had been done wrong.

"The way to my house doesn't look like that. It's just a lake."

"Is that seriously what André and Firmin thought about my threats? Those idiots!"

"What's with Carlotta's wig? It's huge!"

He was immensely pleased with the chandelier falling, however. He clapped and laughed along as it fell.

All in all, however, he thought it needed work. Of course, he thought as he exited the theater, he _was_ the real Opera Ghost. Of course he'd be critical. All thoughts of the movie were driven out of his mind, however, as he accidentally bumped into the two people who had sat behind them during the movie, and had exited before them.

"Erik! Fancy seeing you here!" Christine beamed as she turned and saw her former Angel standing dumbly behind her. Raoul, who had come in with her, stood protectively beside his wife, glaring at the Phantom. "Who's your new friend?"

Danica glomped Erik happily. "I'm Danica Enjolras, and he's my date!" She looked thoughtfully at Christine for a moment. "Wow…you really are blond."

Raoul grinned. "Well, it's nice to see you getting out more, Erik, but _dating_? I didn't know you had it in you!"

"Shut up fop," growled Erik. "You know I could still kill you if I felt like it." He looked so menacing that Raoul stopped smiling and hid behind Christine. Erik was happy he hadn't lost his touch.

Danica giggled. "He really is a fop. I thought you were supposed to protect Christine, not the other way around." Raoul stuck his tongue out at her, which only made her laugh more.

"What are you doing here anyway?" asked Erik, directing the question more at Christine.

"We have as much right to go on vacation as you do," she replied. "And besides," she said with a smile, "we'd heard about the contest your phans set up for you, and figured you'd be busy for the next few weeks. So we took advantage of you not being able to stalk me and went on a trip."

"I don't _stalk_ you," said Erik, offended.

"Oh, I beg to differ," said Raoul huffily.

"Well, maybe back then, but not anymore."

"Only because you're surrounded by thousands of obsessed phangirls who can barely let you move an inch without screaming in adoration." He sounded jealous.

"_Thousands_?!" Erik glared at Danica.

She shuffled her feet. "Well…you never actually asked how many of us there were. We all thought the number would scare you." (A/N: It's true, I read in some phic, 'After all, to the worshipees, we're scary.')

Erik looked back at Raoul, almost afraid to ask. "How many do you have?"

He looked down, as did Christine. "Well…five, that I've met so far. But I'll tell you this – five are a lot easier to manage than your thousand!" Erik glared at him.

Christine, being as intuitive as she is, sensed the tension between the old rivals, and, what was more, spotted Erik's hand going into his pocket. "Well, we'd better get going," she said hurriedly. "Nice seeing you again, Erik!" And she pushed Raoul protesting out of the theater, away from Erik's Punjab lasso.

Danica clapped happily. "You scared them away!" And she glomped him again, which was rather odd, as she still hadn't let go from the first time.

"I need a drink," muttered Erik, and headed back to the café with Danica trailing behind.

………………………………

I'm sorry if I offended any fans of Gerard Butler, Emmy Rossum, or Raoul out there. I just happen to not like all of them. Read and review! And don't be mad! (hides from crowd of Raoul fangirls with potatoes)


	8. Project Phantom

Am now updating. I'm in my Phantom costume (minus mask and gloves – hard to breathe and type respectively) all ready for the movie. Which won't start for about five hours. So I'm passing the time by updating.

Lazy.kender19: Your lightswitch…turns on the Internet. I don't know, that's kind of cool. (flip) INTERNET! Oh, don't hurt the poor books. Books are good things. ;)

Hey, I have an idea. I just put a chatroom on one of my websites – the Inuyasha one in my profile. If it works, we can use that!

LuckyEponine04: Yay! Oh, yesterday I watched Les Mis in movie form, but not the musical. I was singing the songs all through the movie. It was weird, to see Valjean being threatened by Javert on screen, while I sang, "Valjean, at last we see each other plain…" Etc.

MiMi: Why does Raoul look like a pirate in the movie?! (thinks) You're right, he does! HAHA! No clue. Must just be the swordfight scene. Yup, you can be in it.

Phantomraver: Oh, a cookie! (chomp) First apples, now cookies! Reviews keep me from going hungry! …If anyone wants to offer pizza…hint hint. Heehee. Tsk tsk. You already got one cyberhug. One per reviewer. ;)

ButterflyOfLothlorien: Love your name. Both of them. A hug for the desc. (hugs)

And sure you can be in it.

Eat-drums: Three times? And you saw The Woman in White? LUCKY! (now wants to move to England) I adore Michael Crawford…and don't like what I've heard of Butler so far. But maybe he'll grow on me too.

Kianra: A list? Uh, yeah sure, hang on…SummerSong, FaithoftheForsaken, Danica Enjolras, JessicaDwyer, LoneGunGirl88, Lazy.kender19, The Flying Breadstick, Kianra (you!), Phoenixthemenace, Kojinka, Mandy the O, FaithoftheForsaken's friend, Phantomraver, EmeraldSkygoddess, MiMi, MortRouge, and Eat-drums. In no particular order. It's long. I'm doing the dedicated reviewers first. Yeah, they should have used the people from Broadway. At least.

SummerSong: O.O Wow. Ooh – that's a good fic idea! A Phantom wedding…

Priest: Do you Erik, take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife?

Erik: NO! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, NO!

Heehee. Poor Erik. Normally I don't like bashing him. He should be worshiped. What's wrong with me?

Ratha Ryou Aree: Ratha! Yay, you're here! Finally! (talking to all the other reviewers) I go to school with her!

MetaChi: OH! Zim. Yeah. I normally just call it Zim. That quote is on my Yahoo profile too. I love it. "After all, to the worshipees, we're scary." We are, it's true. Oh, and if you don't mind, I'm going to borrow a little something else from your fic.

MortRouge: 50 reviews already! Wow, thanks! I love Japanese – I spent most of my time on this site in the anime section before I discovered Phantom fanfiction. And technically…with all respect to our Erik, pretty much everyone is more handsome than him. (Erik is annoyed…) Well it's true! And I will truly tell you about it! Although my European reviewer has already seen it three times. (glares at eat-drums)

Okay, too many review replies. It's all Kianra's fault, she wanted a list. Just kidding.

……………………………

Aislin looked up at a very distraught Erik and a very happy Danica. When they arrived, Danica happily began chatting with Kimberly about the date and their encounter with Raoul and Christine. Meanwhile, Jessica leaped up and stood by Erik. "My turn!"

"But I wanted a drink!" protested Erik, as Jessica dragged him off down the street.

Resigned to staying with her for at least three hours, he stopped struggling and walked with her. This had one good thing – she now let go of him. It was good to see that she hadn't been as clingy as Danica had been. Jessica skipped along beside him for a good ten minutes before Erik began to grow frustrated.

"So…where are we going?" he inquired at last. It wasn't a nice feeling to be hanging around this girl with no clue of what was going to happen.

"We've got two tickets to go on one of those Hollywood bus tours." Jessica seemed excited.

"A tour?" Erik didn't like those tours. There was one in Paris that stopped off at the Opera House, and it was always full of curious people interested in getting a look at 'the Opera Ghost's lair.' Some tourists were even daring enough to climb in the boat and attempt to get across the lake. Which was very entertaining for the Siren in the lake, but caused Erik a lot of grief. His job was to terrorize the Opera, not random tourists. And the Siren enjoyed her job of keeping outsiders out a little too much.

But maybe being in the tour would be more fun.

Wrong.

It was a large, blue, double-decker bus, with unfortunate owners of cheaper tickets on the bottom level and lucky owners of better tickets on the top level with the tour guide. It was just a perk of being in this contest that Erik and his dates got the best of everything, and managed to get front seats on the top level.

Erik was sitting on the edge, by a rather small protective railing.

He could handle heights, and in all honesty, the bus wasn't that high. But when it was speeding along a busy street and he had no wall protecting him from falling out, he got a little nervous.

"Welcome to Hollywood Tours," said a happy, bouncy woman at the front of the bus. She looked like she enjoyed her job too much. "Before we get started, I would like to point out that we have a…sort of celebrity on the bus today!"

Erik looked around, and found the guide pointing at him. "Let's welcome Erik, the Phantom of the Opera!" He blushed, as both levels of the bus clapped, and a small group of girls at the back cheered. Erik turned, and saw Kat, Summer, Breanna, and some other girls he didn't recognize shouting happily. What were they doing here? Why was his fanclub following him everywhere he went?

It was true – they all wore black T-shirts that read "Project Phantom", and a few sported masks. It looked like he really did have a fanclub. Scratch that – make that phanclub. The girls happily waved roses in the air and sang his theme song together.

"Who are these girls?" wondered the tour guide.

Summer stood up and announced to the whole bus – "We represent the Erik phangirls of all over the world. We are an Internet based group called Project Phantom, promoting E/C phanfiction and all-around worshiping the Phantom of the Opera!"

"Erik! Erik! Erik! Erik!" chanted the other girls. It looked like he'd found out who had been standing shouting outside his door the day of the first date. He envisioned a large group of Project Phantomers pounding down the hotel door.

The tour didn't go too well. Aside from being terrified of toppling out of the bus, every one of the Project Phantom members came up individually to either talk to him, glomp him, or just stare at him until the next phan came to wave her away. They all greeted Jessica like they knew her.

Consequently he missed everything the tour guide said. That was saying a lot, because she had an annoyingly loud, high voice. He caught the names of a few American movie stars he'd heard about, but didn't get much else.

Erik spent most of the ride looking warily over the side of the bus, ignoring phangirls as best he could, and having Jessica leaning on him affectionately. It was awkward, especially as it pushed him farther towards the side of the bus.

They stopped off at the Walk of Fame, where they spent half an hour trudging along, looking at the names on the street.

"Hey, look, Mickey Mouse!" exclaimed Jessica. She stopped to take a picture of the cartoon character's star on the sidewalk.

Erik continued on, with Jessica running to catch up, looking at all the stars famous people had had put down. Most of them were of older actors he'd barely heard of, but he recognized a few of them.

When they reached the end of the Walk, they found the bus and the tour guide waiting for them. "Everyone back on the bus!" she called cheerfully. Erik was disgusted to see that she now wore, in place of her tour uniform, a black Project Phantom T-shirt. Apparently the member with the huge canvas bag was selling shirts to prospective members and 'converting non-believers,' as she later called it.

As Erik and Jessica climbed back onto the bus with the rest of the group, they heard a loud, angry shout from back on the sidewalk.

"IT'S NOT HERE! IT'S AN INSULT I TELL YOU, AN INSULT!"

"HOW DARE THEY NOT HAVE ONE!"

"WE SHOULD DO IT OURSELVES! Who has a can of spraypaint?

"I've got one, here, in my purse!"

As Erik looked over the side carefully, he saw five Project Phantomers kneeling at the end of the Walk, attempting to spray paint his name within a makeshift star on the concrete, with the other twelve or so members standing around and applauding. A policeman came running down the street, and the five girls screamed and ran away.

"ERIK LIVES!!!" they yelled as they fled. The other Project Phantomers left behind took up the cry. ERIK LIVES echoed down the whole street. Erik slid down in his seat as Jessica added he voice to the tumult.

After that, the tour took them to other places in the city, but Erik had no inclination to leave the bus. Disappointed, Jessica stayed with him, attempting to cheer him up, but having no luck. They simply returned to the little street café, Jessica quite subdued after inadvertently depressing Erik.

The Ghost, in turn, was all too aware of the group of Project Phantomers, rejoined by their delinquent friends, still following him, just out of reach of the Punjab lasso.

…………………………….

I was afraid this chapter wouldn't be funny at all, but when I had the idea to have some Project Phantomers make an appearance, it got really funny. It's in honor of me joining Project Phantom just today. Read and review!


	9. Crazy Phangirls

IT WAS WONDERFUL! Seriously. I'm going to give you my review of the actors and of the overall movie. I couldn't tell if Christine's voice was more little girlish or womanly. Plus, on a lot of her lines, she slurred the words together and sounded like she was drunk. Raoul had a light, feathery voice – I liked it – and was very cute. JUST cute – like little boy cute. But that's a big compliment anyway because I hate Raoul. Carlotta was hilarious, and I actually think she sings better than Christine, except for the scenes when she's singing badly on purpose (because she's Carlotta). As for the Phantom, his voice wasn't smooth and hypnotic like the Phantom should be – it was rough, harsh, and choppy. There were times when I wanted to close my eyes and revel in his voice, and there were time when it made me flinch. They all made great visual characters. The movie itself was beautiful, and I cried at the end (of course). There was a cute scene when Christine was singing Think of Me, and it went down through the floors to show the Phantom pacing in a cellar listening from below. And some guy mooned Carlotta during Prima Donna!

LoneGunGirl88: You're exactly the way I'd pictured you! Weird… I despise pink, it is an evil color. Ask all my friends, they know. (hugs)

MortRouge: It's good for us all to love Erik – that way we learn that looks aren't everything, but if the guy has a sexy voice, GRAB HIM! I swear, I'm dying to see Fruits Basket, it just looks so funny! But I don't have the money for a DVD, can't download off the computer, and don't have time to rent from my local anime store. I'll see it someday, though.

Phantomraver: ERIK LIVES! Yes he does.

Eat-drums: Oh, Wales. Dunno why I assumed England. Still – Europe. Ever been to France?

MiMi: We are rabid – that's how we show we care! Welcome to the world of Fandom.

Leanan Sidhe: Yup, you can be in it as well. (hugs) I'll add you to my list.

Hilary: Who is lazy.kender19 and is too lazy to log on. We'll have to schedule a time. Hm…wonder what your time zone is?

SummerSong: That sounds cool…I should use that…

Kianra: We should totally spraypaint our own star there.

EmeraldSkyGoddess: Well, now that you mention it…

TameranianRaven: I'll send you the Project Phantom link. Apparently I've turned you into a true phan. (points) Another of my school friends!

Awesome – even with the movie review, that didn't take up too much space. Next chapter!

…………………………………….

Aislin glanced up from her Solitaire game as Erik came up. "Lucky for you, Erik, only one…what's with the fanclub?"

Erik realized that the Project Phantomers had closed in while he stood still. Seventeen phangirls, more than he'd yet seen in one place, surrounded him on all sides, smiling, giggling, and a couple of the weaker ones fainting. Aislin stood up to shoo them away. "I've already told you, you'll all get your turn. Now go away."

"ERIK LIVES!" cried one of the girls as they ran off, laughing happily and dragging the fainted ones away.

"I KNOW!" called Asilin. "I'm one of you, remember?"

"You're in Project Phantom?" asked Erik scathingly.

Aislin grinned. "What do you think? I _am_ a self-respecting phangirl after all. Anyway, it's Kimberly's turn, and then we can all go home. It's getting dark after all." She was right. The sun was just beginning to set. "I'd give you two two hours at least. Now go."

Kimberly, who was obviously the most…normal of all three girls, walked off with Erik.

He still was of the opinion that Kimberly looked rather dangerous. She wore all black, like Aislin did every day, and was completely silent. Although, as he walked along, he realized it might just be shyness that kept her silent.

At first, this was quite enjoyable. He liked the silence for a while. But then it started to get awkward. He was used to not talking when he was alone, but when he was actually out with someone it felt weird. After fifteen silent minutes, he decided it was time to make some conversation.

"So…seen any good operas lately?" He immediately felt stupid.

"I've never been to an opera."

"Oh." Strike one. "Well. Um…where are we going?"

Kimberly pulled another piece of paper out of her pocket. No doubt the next direction from Aislin. Wonderful. "It looks like we're going to dinner."

Dinner! Perfect! After his first two dates, he was pretty hungry. "What restaurant?"

"Not a restaurant." She jerked her large backpack for emphasis. "I've got dinner in here. We're going to a park just outside of town and eating there."

Oh. Okay. "Uh…I'm not really an outdoorsy person." Kimberly shrugged and kept walking. Apparently they were walking to the park.

Oh, yeah, they were walking all right.

"Just…out of town…huh?" huffed Erik, who was used to rowing, but certainly not to walking. Miles. He was extremely tired once they reached the little desolated park, full of trees, twittering birds, and fading sunlight. He collapsed facedown in the dirt by a pond.

"Ow. My feet." He pulled his mask off for a moment to wipe the dirt and sweat off his face.

Kimberly, meanwhile, had set up her backpack on a lone picnic table. She pulled out two takeout boxes. Apparently the café had provided dinner.

Erik sat down on one of the benches attached to the table, his tux now considerably dusty. He opened one of the boxes, and found a delicious-looking ham sandwich, a bag of potato chips, and a cookie. Kimberly handed him a can of root beer, and he started eating.

He had to admit, this was his favorite of all the dates so far. True, he downed half the soda right away, to relieve his burning lungs from the walk, and then he nearly choked to death on the carbonation, but other than that, it went quite well. Kimberly didn't try to attack him, or randomly hug him, or throw a vegetable at him. She was, in fact (dare he say it?) completely sane. After she'd gotten used to him, she was able to talk easily.

They discussed Kimberly's life, and Erik's life at the Opera. She told him about her family, and he told her about the easily frightened ballet girls (who really were getting harder and harder to scare). They discussed weather, music, and ultimately, Erik's own opera. They even talked a little about the musical. Erik said he thought the musical was done very well, but the movie was definitely under-par.

All in all, they both had fun. When darkness fell, they tossed their trash in a garbage can, Erik gave Kimberly his uneaten cookie (he'd just never been a cookie person), and he led her back to the café in the darkness.

Aislin stood tapping her foot by the rented van, with Danica and Jessica staring out of the windows for Erik and Kimberly. "You're late! The driver doesn't want to wait – let's go."

The driver flat out refused to play any CDs, so they all sang quietly under their breath, gradually increasing in volume until they might have well been playing the CD. The driver snatched it out of Jessica's outstretched hand and stuffed in into the player, and they all sang happily. Yes, even Erik.

They dropped each girl off at their homes, and drove back to the hotel. When they'd gotten back up to their room, Aislin turned to Erik. "How did they go?"

"Fine…" Erik said.

"That last one…" She trailed off.

"She was normal." He shrugged.

Aislin grinned. "I bet you liked her, huh?"

Erik shook his head sadly. "I miss the crazy phangirls."

………………………………..

Sorry it was so short. The next one will be longer, I promise. ;) I have ideas…

Oh, one more thing about the movie – I think they kind of _underdid_ the Phantom's makeup. I really didn't think he looked all _that _deformed. I could easily have gotten on with the way he looked. It just looked like his face had been a little burned in places. Or something.

Read and review!


	10. When the Crypt Doors Creak

**NOTE**: I have decided…decided. (Past…the point of no return…heheh…) No, seriously. I have decided that I am not going to accept any more requests to have dates. You can have a cameo if you want, but no more date requests. I just have so many lined up!

MetaChi: Yes, that's the reference I meant. I just really liked the Siren's character. I think the best thing about her in that fic is the scene with the hand puppets. (waves a little Siren puppet) To everyone else: If you haven't yet, go read _Erik is Fired!_ It's great.

SummerSong: Erik does need us. I know _I_ would get bored with normal people eventually. That's why I write fanfiction. And associate with you guys. You're as far from normal as things get. (It's also why I watch anime – anime people like me are even less normal.) You know, it WILL end…eventually. Actually, in Erik's time, we've only just finished the second day of dates.

LoneGunGirl88: Don't worry, he liked you. I think he's just growing accustomed to rabid phangirls all over him. He may even enjoy it by the end of the fic. (Or maybe he won't.) Ah! I've given your life meaning! (is proud)

MortRouge: Yay! I'm the highlight of someone's day! Good for you, I'm going to see it again today. It would have been cool if someone had fainted. But I mean, come on, no one even gasped. Although…a sexed up Erik…hmm…(doesn't know if she likes it or not) I love the musical and I try to stay true to the book, but Michael Crawford's voice is so…Phantom-y. I've grown to associate them. I know hiragana! (Am learning katakana but have no time to study.) I just don't know much kanji. (No one knows what they are talking about.) Oh…sorry.

MiMi: Raoul's a tarantula? I can see Erik as a snake, but uh…

Lazy.kender19: Was it about Carlotta getting mooned or Christine sounding drunk? East coast…that would be one hour later than me. (I'm Central.) So if it's eight where you are, it's seven where I am. (All hopes of meeting you in person fade away…) You tripped IN your audition? Sorry. And someone once told me my voice was really nasal when I thought I did pretty good…(sniff)

Phantomraver: PONR was great, right?

Eat-drums: But I'm a girl with a good voice that still needs coaching, and I learned long ago not to scoop notes and to separate words with good consonants. I suppose I can't really talk though, as she's had more training than I have.

The Flying Breadstick: You're back! Heh. Nice desc. (hugs warily) The Fish Revolution!

Phoenixthemenace: Interesting. (hugs) Okay. Kathleen. Good, because we already used one Kat. Project Phantom is a kind of club on FanFiction. See the link below.

Neonn: Sorry, no more dates. But I'll give you that cameo.

Kianra: It's okay. I'm going to see it again today, and I'm dressed as Erik as I type. That's even weirder, because I'm a girl.

…………………………………..

Erik lay in bed for a few hours that night thinking. He slept with the covers and pillows piled on top of him to simulate the closed feeling of his coffin. He missed his coffin…with its shiny black wood and its comfy purple velvet lining.

He was wondering how he could possibly _miss_ the hyper phans. He'd had a lovely outing with Kimberly – they'd talked and laughed and had fun.

And he missed the hyper phans?

He bet he'd be missing Kimberly by tomorrow.

He got up before Aislin the next day – bright and early at 7:00. Well…he figured it was early, but he sure wasn't bright. He was actually kind of dull. He wasn't used to getting up that early, so his hair was totally messed up and his face looked worse than it normally did (which, seriously, is saying a lot). Only half awake, he stumbled out of bed into the bathroom.

Where he found Aislin, halfway through getting dressed.

They stared at each other for a minute, Erik still trying to register what it was he was seeing. Then Aislin darted forward and slammed the door in his face.

"Pervert!" said her muffled voice.

Erik sat down on the floor before the bathroom door. "I thought you were still asleep!"

"Does it look like I'm asleep!?"

"Well…" He looked at Aislin's bed and saw…a pillow.

"Well…I was tired!"

He sat there for ten minutes, while she finished dressing and getting ready. Then she huffily stalked out of the bathroom, and Erik went in after her.

He showered to wake himself up, and got ready for the day.

When he came out, he found Aislin sitting in front of the window, Phantom CD back in the player, completely ignoring him. It wasn't until he poked her from behind that she consented to turn around. "Wasn't quite ready for that stage in a relationship," she said loudly, through her music.

"We don't have a relationship," said Erik confusedly.

She turned off the music. "I know, but I'd feel better about what just happened if I said we did." She handed him an envelope. "Take this down to the girl waiting in the lobby. Well…you know, chances are she's waiting right outside the door. Anyway, she'll come up to you. Give it to her – she knows where you're going." She resumed her staring.

Erik wondered why she never just told him who he was going out with. He figured it was because she wanted to keep him (and her readers) in suspense until the last minute.

Sure enough, waiting outside the door was the same girl who'd been there that first day. She stood up happily. "Hi Erik! I'm Hilary, and it's _finally_ my turn."

Hilary had blue-green eyes and a kind of golden-brown color of wavy hair. She looked waaay too hyper and excited for seven in the morning. He gave her the envelope and she led him down the hall.

Hilary hopped into the elevator with Erik. He grew increasingly more uncomfortable as Hilary inched closer and closer to him, until she was pressing hard against his side, squashing him against the wall. The elevator doors opened. He leaped out as fast as possible.

"Personal space," he growled.

Hilary nodded solemnly, and led him to the front of the hotel, where they waited five minutes for a small red trolley-type bus. Once they were on it, Erik looked at his companion.

"Where are we going _today_?"

She just grinned. "You'll see!"

The bus took them into a large parking lot, where they were dropped off with a crowd of other people, all talking happily, many accompanied by small children. They made their way to a row of what looked like ticket booths.

Erik started to hear music. Not 'violin in the graveyard' music, but…Disney music?

"Oh, no… Hilary, please don't tell me…"

"We're going to DISNEYLAND!"

Great. The perfect place for a dark, murderous Opera Ghost. Disneyland – the Happiest Place on Earth. Erik didn't feel too happy.

As their tickets were in the envelope, Hilary led him straight in, after having a cast member check them. They stood before a large garden of flowers arranged to look like a smiling Mickey Mouse. She pushed him in, under a bridge that had an old-fashioned train chugging over it.

They now stood on Main Street, U.S.A. The shops and restaurants all looked quaint and inviting, but Hilary grabbed Erik's hand and positively dragged him down the street to a large castle – Sleeping Beauty Castle. They passed through, and were now in Fantasyland, with all sorts of rides based on the Disney movies.

Hilary loved it, but it was a nightmare for poor Erik. They rode rides based on Snow White, Peter Pan, Alice in Wonderland, and Mr. Toad. Who the heck was Mr. Toad? Erik had never heard of that movie. But all the rides were slow and full of happy voices and bright characters. He thought he was going to go insane.

"Hilary," he gasped, as they exited Small World, a boat ride much like his own lake, until they went inside and heard all the little characters singing the same infectious song. The same…song…That song… "Can't we go somewhere good next?"

She thought for a minute. "Oh! I know a ride you'll like. Aislin suggested it. It's her favorite ride." Great. More cutesy characters probably.

Hilary took him halfway across the park, to a large, creepy-looking mansion. "What is this?" Erik looked around wildly. This place was weird…he liked what he was seeing.

"We're in New Orleans Square, and this is the Haunted Mansion."

"_Haunted Mansion?_"

They had barely walked inside the house when Erik decided, "_This is the best ride in the whole park._" It was full of mysterious sounds, flying objects, scary ghosts, and a talking head inside a crystal ball. There was one ghost – a female one in the attic with a beating red heart and a tattered wedding gown – that made him think of Christine for a moment, but it didn't last long.

True, they were singing in this ride too, but the song was eerie and was sung by weird voices. As they exited the ride, Erik couldn't say enough good things about it. He wanted to go again, but Hilary refused.

After lunch in a restaurant in New Orleans Square, and a few more rides, like Pirates of the Caribbean – another enjoyable boat ride, and Splash Mountain – a log ride with a huge drop that neither of them really liked, Hilary said goodbye to Erik by a statue of King Triton.

"Aislin said you've got one more date here today." She didn't sound happy. Apparently, she'd wanted her own outing to last much longer. "She'll be waiting for you at Snow White's wishing well." Hilary glomped him quickly, and dashed off toward Adventureland. "See you again sometime!"

Erik braced himself and headed for the well.

……………………………

I hope that was a good long chapter. Read and review! I'm going to a movie! _In sleep he sang to me…_

Oh, by the way, for whoever asked me, I got my white half-mask at a store called Party City. Also, here's the link to Project Phantom, again for whoever asked, just take out the spaces:

groups.yahoo .com/group/ ProjectPhantom


	11. Dazed and Rather Nautious

(screams) I have over 100 reviews! One of my goals in life has been realized! Now I just have to play Christine in a Broadway production of Phantom and I can die happy. Seriously, though. I woke up yesterday to _nineteen_reviews. Sorry I didn't update yesterday, but I was in shock. I'm only replying to who I really have to.

MortRouge: Yeah, kanji is rooted in Chinese, but it's commonly used, not just for computers. No, I have never seen Phantom of the Paradise, I heard it was a disgrace to the name of Phantom. A crazed DJ murdering teeny-boppers?

Lazy.kender19: I'm a Texas girl. (grins) And LOTR ROCKS!!! It's my favorite movie, and my second favorite book…series. Oh, BTW, Haunted Mansion _is_ my favorite Disneyland ride, and it's a lot of fun.

MiMi: I like Small World! (and Pirates) And I've never been on Space Mountain – I was always scared. I planned on going when I went this last summer, but it was closed for repairs.

Raveene: Sorry…eh…no more date requests. (hugs anyway) But I'll fit you into some chapter.

Jessi: I'll e-mail you as soon as I can!

Eat-drums: I like singing exams! Just had one last week, matter of fact. Passed with flying colors! I feel _pretty_ confident saying that I'm the best singer in my class. A Merry Phantomy Christmas to all!

Andromeda167: Yay! A new convert! And I cracked up with your little skit – awesome. (cringing all around) Hey, I'm Miss Author Aislin! Cool.

Nessarose: Aw…(hugs) You too may have a cameo.

Okay. We're only about halfway through the list I have here. Not even half. Hope no one objects to a _really_ long fic. Anyway, new chappie! Sorry to make you wait!

……………………………………..

"I'm meeting a girl at a wishing well," muttered Erik. "Wonderful." Oh well. Maybe he could get another ride on the Haunted Mansion out of this one.

Standing beside an old-fashioned little well full of pennies that seemed to be singing on its own was a girl with reddish-blond hair who was gazing bored up into the sky, adding her own voice to the song. Which, incidentally, sounded really odd, as the well was singing "I'm Wishing" from Snow White, and the girl was singing "Point of No Return." Erik knew this had to be the one.

He walked slowly up to the well, scowling, his cape swirling threateningly. A little girl who was tiptoeing up to the side of the well saw him, and, whimpering, dashed to her mother standing a few feet away. Looking both scared and angry, she whisked her daughter away.

"Why are all little kids scared of me!?" screamed Erik, making a few other tourists gasp and edge nervously away. The girl at the well, however, spotted him and, squealing, ran up to him.

"Hi Erik! My name's Kara." She held out her hand, and Erik took it. Her grip was surprisingly strong. She did not let go. "I know Hilary, who you just saw?"

Oh, great, they were friends. Erik tried to wrench his hand free, but Kara held tight. "We have the rest of the day to be together. Personally, I think we got the better half of the day. Fireworks!" And with that, she dragged him off in the direction of Small World.

"Oh, God, not that again," he moaned, but Kara led him to the left, and under another bridge to…an extremely warped looking world.

It was as if he'd walked into a solidified, three-dimensional cartoon. The buildings were all round, bulging, and colorful, and strange sounds floated across the air from strange places.

"Where are we?"

"Toontown!" And they were. It was a part of the park constructed to look exactly like a living cartoon. If it was fun for Kara and the other tourists, it was extremely disturbing for Erik. He who was used to dark, dank cellars and lofty Opera Houses felt very out of place in a cartoon world. Kara took him in and out of the cartoon Post Office, and they visited the homes of Chip and Dale and Donald Duck. It involved a lot of walking. Kara seemed to have the energy, but by the time Kara said she wanted to visit Mickey Mouse in his house, he had lost most of his. He merely nodded and headed for the line.

And what a line it was.

Erik had never seen so many people waiting to see something, except for the night Christine had starred in Hannibal and a load of operagoers stood waiting outside the Opera House for an hour. They joined the line and waited.

And waited.

And waited some more.

"Will we _ever_ get to see something?" muttered Erik.

"We're probably about halfway there," answered Kara, who had heard him somehow.

Erik's feet were aching. He longed for nothing more than to sit down somewhere and massage his poor feet. But there were no chairs in the cartoon house, and he couldn't get back outside because the half of the line that was now behind him was blocking the exit. There was only one way out, and that was to wait it out.

At long last, they reached the front of the line.

Kara laughed happily and threw herself into the arms of the character before her. Erik had to admit, meeting a character like Mickey must be (to Kara, at least) of the same sort of thrill she got when she met him. Luckily she hadn't thrown herself into Erik's arms.

After Kara had collected an autograph and had her picture taken, she beckoned to Erik.

"Is it time to go now," he asked wearily.

"No, no! It's your turn!" And before Erik could protest, she had shoved him into the arms of Mickey. Erik noticed he was bigger in person, as he clamped the Opera Ghost to his side.

"You wanna ease up a bit, Mickey?" he gasped.

And with Erik struggling and suffocating at his side, Kara snapped a picture of them.

Mickey abruptly let go, and Erik, who wasn't ready for it, dropped to the ground. He quickly stood up, straightened his mask and cape, and swept furiously out.

He wanted to yell at Kara, he wanted to Punjab her, he really did. But there was something odd about the way she grinned at him when he stalked up to her that…kind of melted him. Of course, after she skipped off with him, it all came back.

A whole hour of their time already gone, they got on a few more rides, which were more exciting than the first. The Matterhorn, which was a bobsled ride that whizzed all around a small mountain, and the Indiana Jones ride, which bumped and jostled them around so much that Erik's mask fell off and cracked at the bottom of the Jeep they were riding in. Being full of fire, monsters, and threatening voices, Erik enjoyed this ride very much. Until the mask incident, of course. Luckily it was still wearable for the day.

"We have time for just one more ride, Erik," said Kara, looking at her watch.

"Oh, good," said Erik dully. The cracked mask didn't want to stay on his face, and he had to hold it continually, for fear it would fall and shatter altogether, scaring more kids. The last thing he wanted was another "Track Down This Murderer" episode to cap off the day.

Back into Fantasyland they went, where Kara led him to a colorful ride with whistling flute music. After waiting for twenty minutes, she took him onto a large disc full of large teacups. They climbed into a big yellow cup and waited for the ride to start.

They hadn't been there but ten seconds when Hilary dashed up to get into their cup, a pair of Mickey Mouse ears perched on her head.

"Can I join you in a cup of tea?" she said, and then dissolved into giggles with Kara.

"What are you still doing here?" Erik asked.

"I was allowed to stay in the park all day, and decided to follow you two around. That Indiana Jones ride is really something, isn't it?"

Erik leaned back. "What does this ride do, anyway?"

No sooner than he had asked, the cups started spinning. Kara and Hilary turned the disc in their cup so fast that Erik was afraid their cup would unscrew itself and go flying. They spun so fast that he couldn't lean forward again – the speed held him back. He held on to the cup and his loose mask for dear life.

The ride was over in a few minutes. Kara and Hilary laughed as they supported each other out of the gate, and Erik stumbled after. When he'd got his balance back, he waved goodbye and dashed off to the park exit before Kara or Hilary knew what had happened to him.

His legs carried him to the tram that took him back to the hotel, up to his room, and into his bed. As he collapsed into his bed, Mask Number Two fell to the floor and broke into two pieces.

………………………………..

I hope that was a good enough chapter to satisfy you all from yesterday. I don't need to tell you what to do now.


	12. When You Give a Ghost a Cookie

Merry Late Christmas, everyone! Couldn't update yesterday because my family was doing stuff. Reviews!

Hikaze Chimizu: Phantom scared them? That's sad…I've been listening since I was six or seven. I was never scared.

MortRouge: Sorry. I guess I've just been writing him like I talk normally. I'll work on that. I don't know if I really want to see it, but I feel like I should. My obedient servant! I'll hold you to that. Heheh…

Phantomraver: They used two-sided tape to hold them mask to his face in the movie? Uh…okay. Well, I don't think Erik would agree to that.

Eat-drums: You have a Masquerade music box?! I'm dying for one of those, but I didn't know they actually existed. I got a Sarah Brightman CD, and she sings Music of the Night. It feels weird, like Christine is trying to seduce Erik with it or something…it's good, but I think that song should be confined to guys playing the Phantom.

Lazy.kender19: I don't know all of that song, only a few random lines. Oh, my friend (Tameranian Raven on here) got the full soundtrack from the movie. O.O I wouldn't mind having it for the extended overture, but I don't think I'd be able to listen to those vocals for long without being sick. Unless I sang over them…but no.

Pervy Elf-Fancier: Actually, Butler hadn't sung since he was twelve, and then only in pubs. My dear girl, there are more phangirls out here than you could count in a lifetime. There was a time when I too believed myself the only girl ever to love Erik. Then I came here.

PenelopeBlack13: Cameo, yup, yup. (writes it down) I don't know what a LiveJournal is, so I apparently don't have one.

ButterflyOfLothlorien: Don't worry, you'll be in it. I'm just putting people in basically in the order I got their requests, and yours was rather late.

And here we have a timesaver!

…………………………………….

Erik sat up the next morning. Today he actually had awakened before Aislin – he could see her head poking out from the covers where she remained curled up in a ball.

It wasn't all that early. It was already nine thirty, by the alarm clock on the table. Erik went to wash up for the day, staring disconsolately at his reflection in the mirror. After he was clean and dressed, he went to the drawer that his things were in to retrieve a mask. It was his last one – he'd only taken two extras. One had been shattered by Kat, and one had split in two on a ride. He figured he'd have to be extra careful with this one.

Aislin jerked awake. "Erik," she muttered blearily. "Are you ready?" He nodded. "Go down to room 135 on the fourth floor. Your next…thing is down there." She slumped back in the bed tiredly leaving Erik with no further instructions.

Obediently, and still a little sleepy, he headed downstairs first to get something to eat, and after a buttered croissant, dragged himself back up to the fourth floor, where he found room 135 and knocked.

The door was pulled open by a girl with long, extremely straight, dark brown hair, hazel eyes, and freckles. She grinned widely and bowed ridiculously low to welcome him in. "Hi Erik. I'm Stephanie."

"So you're my next date?" Erik stepped in and turned to face her, where she stood by the door.

"In a manner of speaking."

Erik looked confused. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Well…I'm _one_ of your next dates."

Erik stared in horror. "What do you mean, _one_ of them?"

He whirled around to see no less than four other girls in the room. Stephanie strode over to them to introduce them.

"This is Phoenix, Gina, Mandy, and Jenna." She indicated a stunning blond, another brown-haired girl with shorter hair, another freckly brunette, and a pale, dark-haired girl in turn.

"Right, well," Erik fidgeted nervously. "Who do I have to take out first?"

"Oh, we're not going out," said Gina happily. "And we're not going individually."

"We're going to have a little party right here!" piped up Jenna. She pointed to one of the beds in the room, which was covered with snack foods, sodas, plates, and a CD player.

Phoenix dashed to the CD player and switched on a loud, horrible song that echoed strangely in the cramped room. The girls and Erik all screamed and clapped their hands to their ears.

"What is it?" shrieked Mandy.

"I don't know! I just turned it on to some station! I can't find the volume dial!"

"TURN IT OFF FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!!" Stephanie finally ran up and gave the poor machine a good whack with the clock on the table. It sputtered and died. For a minute all the girls stared at it.

"We're gonna need another CD player," declared Jenna.

"I've got it!" called Gina. For a minute, only her feet were visible, waving in the air as she searched her backpack on the other side of the bed. She pulled herself back a second later, triumphantly holding another CD player high above her head. The girls cheered, and Erik slid limply into a chair in the corner.

With the stereo finally playing someone's Phantom soundtrack correctly, they all started to serve themselves from the slightly crushed food on the bed. Phoenix walked up to Erik.

"Want a cookie?"

He looked at the plate of chocolate cookies she was holding out to him. "No, that's okay." Before he could push away the plate, though, Stephanie came pushing her out of the way.

"Cake?"

A little bewildered, he stared at the whole cake she'd pushed under his nose. He had no time to reply, however, as Gina arrived next, with a large bowl of chips. No sooner had she opened her mouth to offer her food, when Jenna stepped up with two fizzing cups of soda. Mandy stood impatiently behind them all with he hands full of candy.

Erik didn't dare open his mouth as the five girls swarmed around him, for fear that one of them might try to force something into it. Only when he had accepted something from each of them did they smile, satisfied, and fall back to the bed. He made sure to sniff the food before eating it.

Twenty minutes later, Phoenix stood over him and his nearly empty plate, looking insulted.

"You didn't eat your cookies."

He glanced at the four uneaten chocolate cookies lying alone on his plate. "I don't like cookies."

"How do you not like cookies?!"

"Do you know what's in those things? Basically butter and sugar. If I want to remain a corpse-like Opera Ghost I can't get myself addicted to pure sugar."

"But they're cookies!" Phoenix picked one up and waved in tantalizingly in his face.

"I don't want to eat the – mmph!" She shoved the cookie into his mouth.

He was both disgusted by it and enjoying it. After all, it was made of chocolate. But that didn't help the fact that he was now choking on it. All the other girls turned to look as Erik coughed up the cookie remains, doubled up on the floor. Stephanie and Mandy cried out and ran to help him. The pounding on his back really didn't help matters, though.

"Stop!" He coughed. "Go away!" Cough again. "Leave me _alone_!" The girls scuttled back to the bed. Erik stood up, his yellow eyes glowing with anger. Although he was at the pinnacle of Opera Ghost intimidation, and they really did look a bit frightened, Gina couldn't help but applaud, impressed.

Disgusted, Erik made for the door. Jenna, however, ran to block the exit.

"Out of my way, you fool," growled Erik.

Jenna held her arms wide and shook her head. It was the phangirls' turn to be intimidating. "We're not letting you leave." She began to close in, and the other girls joined ranks. Before long, Erik was cornered at the back of the room, Track Down This Murderer playing ominously in the background.

Erik, however, was not in a good mood today, and was willing to fight. He pulled out his Punjab lasso. Stephanie let out a little squeal of delight at the sight of it. Erik tightened it threateningly around his wrist. "Try me."

All five girls, as one, lifted their hands to the level of their eyes.

So much for that plan.

"GLOMP HIM!" cried Mandy and Gina together. The girls piled on top of a struggling, screaming Erik. He desperately looked for the end of the date, but he'd lost track of time and the clock, after its rough encounter with the CD player was now blinking twelve o'clock. How long had he been here?

It was time for desperate measures. Jenna was closest to him. He lashed out with the Punjab, and managed to get her round the neck. She cried out, and he gripped the rope firmly.

"I swear to you all, I will do it."

The girls glanced nervously at each other. They all knew enough about the Phantom of the Opera to be assured that he would indeed do it. They were saved the problem of figuring it out, though, when Aislin pulled open the door, looking much more awake now, and extremely angry, her eyes flaming.

"I figured you'd be at about this stage now," she said angrily. "Out." Phoenix, Stephanie, Gina, and Mandy all trooped sadly from the room. Aislin stalked inside and pulled the lasso off of Jenna, who waved happily and ran out. She'd have a cool story to tell her friends now.

Aislin stopped the CD player, which was just reaching the last depressing lines of the finale. Erik quailed beneath her gaze, and meekly followed her back to their own room, lasso dangling innocently by his side.

In their room, she rounded on him.

"_You do not try to kill contestants!_"

Erik hung his head. "Sorry."

Aislin sighed and hugged him, much to his surprise. "That's okay. That's why we all love you. At least no one actually died. I think they actually enjoyed it."

…………………………….

There you go, a nice long chapter. It's my Christmas present to you all. Merry Christmas again!

Your obedient friend,

A. S. ;)


	13. Lasers in the Dark

OMG! I haven't updated in so long, I'm sorry! I've been doing stuff, but that's no excuse. Anyway, a Happy New Year to you all, and a happy belated birthday to Hilary, who became one year crazier on the 27th.

Han Futsu, Anti Normal: (sniff) But we always act like that! It shows how much we love him! Plus, you can't strangle a phangirl, because we (like no other fangirls) have experience in avoiding being strangled. You have to be, around Erik.

Kojinka: That's exactly what I think! Not nearly hypnotic enough – my exact words. But he does make a great _looking_ Erik.

Goddess of the Neon Rose: Cool name. No, I don't have AIM, or any form of IM. But everyone is welcome to email me. It's in my profile.

Phantomraver: I can just see that girl running to her phangirl friends, going, "Guess what? Erik nearly KILLED me!" Then they all scream and/or swoon.

Hikaze Chimizu: You ought to dare. No one's been refused yet.

Leanan Sidhe: Hm…that's a good idea. I might use that. Wait, what? (frantically checks white notebook) But you're not in my date list. Or my cameo list. (freaks out) I thought I was organized! (as if) Did I promise you a date and forget? Please, remind me!

CassieJo: No dates, sorry, but cameo okay? Hey, I'm morbid too, I find the shunned, deformed genius incredibly attractive.

Eat-drums: Crimbo? O.O Oh, Antonio Banderas was in the movie version of Evita, which is how he knows him. He sand Evita and Phantom songs at Andrew's 50th birthday, and that's how he was offered the role of Phantom. I'm a big fan of Antonio (I'm Hispanic), but I really don't think the Phantom should have a Spanish accent. Which, truthfully, I find attractive.

SummerSong: I'm _dying_ to go to New York! One of my smaller dreams is to go to NY for a few weeks and spend the whole time just going to Broadway plays. Your daughter has been transformed! She is officially complete now.

RaptorChick: Again, cameo okay? And yes, the movie is spectacular aside from sub-par voices.

IcySunset: What exactly is Author Alert for? I thought it was a bad thing, but I'm on some lists of people I know like me. Also, are you Katrina (demonslayer email)? If so, cameo okay? (IY rocks!)

Kianra: I will totally read your fic!

ButterflyOfLothlorien: Chocolate biscuits? Are you British? :)

A little note: I got the idea for this chapter from the paintball chapter of _Erik is fired!_ by MetaChi.

………………………………

Erik being rather angry, tired, and sore couldn't remember much of what happened when he woke up the next morning. All he knew was that Aislin poked him until he fell out of bed, then pretty much forced him to dress and pushed him out the door, without so much as a shower.

The bathroom décor was starting to annoy him anyway.

Once outside the room, he blinked dazedly. As he wasn't entirely sure what to do (he thought Aislin had given him some instructions, but they hadn't really sunk in, as he had only been semiconscious), he decided to head downstairs to wait in the lobby. He virtually fell into an elevator with a loud clang and started going down.

He blinked, wondering. _Clang?_

He woke up a bit. The elevator he was in was all silver metal, with no annoying music.

_What's this?_

The doors opened. A large group of kitchen workers greeted him. Erik realized that he'd accidentally gone down in the service elevator. He was in the hotel kitchen. He groaned.

A smiling worker guided Erik out into the main lobby. Erik rubbed his eyes with the back of his hands.

A clock told him that it was twelve o'clock. No wonder Aislin had shoveled him out so fast, he presumed he was late.

Lucky for Erik…well, not really lucky, I guess – his date was painfully obvious. A short Asian girl with her shoulder-length black hair pulled back in a ponytail stood by the glass front doors singing to herself, but that wasn't why she was obvious. It was the black Project Phantom T-shirt she wore that made Erik sure she was his date. He grabbed a glass of water from a table in the indoor café, drinking half and pouring the rest over his face to make himself wake up. He strode over to the girl.

Behind him, a short man returning from the buffet was confused as to why his glass was now empty.

The girl walked up to Erik. "Hi." She held out her hand.

Erik shook it. "Hello. What's your name?"

"Phantomraver."

Erik figured she was another contestant signed up over the Internet. They always had odd names. "What's your real name?"

"I'm not telling you," she said disdainfully. "No one gets to know. Just call me Raver."

Erik didn't think it was the most flattering of names, but he had learned not to argue. Silently, he followed Raver out of the hotel, into a waiting taxi. They drove for twenty minutes or so, and got out in front of a large white building, longer and wider than it was tall. Large red and blue letters over the entrance read _LaserQuest_.

"What's this?" Erik asked nervously, but Raver had already gone in.

The inside of the building was very dark. Arcade games surrounded the walls of a circular room, and a few doors led off to the right. At the back was a square room, part of the main circle, with chairs and other doors. Raver stood at a reception desk to the left. "Erik!" She waved him over.

Looking him up and down, the teenager behind the desk greeted Erik. "Good thing you wore dark clothes. The maze is lit by black light."

"Maze?" They paid Erik no attention.

"Pick a code name," the teenager told Erik.

"Er…Erik." For lack of any other ideas.

The guy raised an eyebrow and shrugged. He typed something into the computer. "Erik's taken."

"With a K?"

More typing. "Yeah."

"Then Phantom." He was more ready the next time around.

"That's taken too."

"You didn't even try that one, though!"

"It's taken by her." He jerked his thumb at Raver. _Figures,_ thought Erik. "How about Opera Ghost?"

He typed it in. "That one works. You've got some weird nicknames. Anyway, you can go through the doors in about five minutes, you came at the perfect time." He motioned them across the room to the row of doors on the right of the circle.

"What exactly are we doing?" Erik inquired, as they joined a short line.

"It's Laser Tag," she told him. "Inside here, you get a gun and a vest, and you hide in a maze trying to shoot other players and get a high score. The more people you hit, and the less times you get hit, the higher your score."

"We get to _shoot_ people?"

"It doesn't hurt them," she said. "They're just harmless lasers."

_But still_, thought Erik excitedly. _I can pretend I'm shooting people I don't like!_

A glance behind him told him he wouldn't need to pretend. _Oh no…_

Behind Raver stood five other girls – all sporting black Project Phantom shirts. "Hi Erik!" said one girl, waving. "Imagine seeing you here!" As if they hadn't planned this 'chance meeting.'

The five girls trooped up to Erik. "I'm Raveene," said the one who had greeted him first. "Not Raven," she clarified. "These are Nessa, Penelope, Hikaze, and Cassie." (A/N: Cameo City!)

Raver greeted them happily. "What are you all doing here?"

"We've come to play Laser Tag, what else?" replied Hikaze.

The doors opened, and the large group of Project Phantomers – plus Erik – crowded in, Erik caught against the tide of girls. Three other random people filed in, looking rather confused at the big party before them.

Inside was a long rectangular room full of pegs with sensor vests and large plastic laser guns. An attendant helped Erik get his on – it felt uncomfortable over the cape.

"You have laser targets on the front, back and shoulders of your vest, as well as on the end of your gun, where the lasers come out," the attendant informed the group of people. "After you get hit, you can't fire or be hit again for five full seconds, so use that time to get away from your assailant. Don't stay with anyone – teams aren't allowed. If you get scared or something, call for an attendant and we'll come get you. At the end of ten minutes, the exit will open – make for the light, and you'll get your scores in a few minutes."

Another door opened, and they all flooded into a large room, full of small walls, turning it into a two level maze. Erik dashed away from the group and up the first set of stairs he saw.

It was dark, and the room was full of smoke and black light. The smoke momentarily blinded Erik, and he coughed. Luckily, his black clothing did not glow. But then, neither did the black Project Phantom shirts.

Erik, the murdering Opera Ghost, was in his element. True, he'd never used a gun before, always the Punjab lasso, but the concept was the same. Wait in the shadows above the victim and strike when they least expect it.

Someone was walking slowly along the passage below, carefully watching each turn. Lucky for Erik, they didn't think to look up. He took aim, and fired through the metal grillework of the floor. She screamed. It was Nessa. Her faint green sensors flashed red, and Erik dashed away.

Turning the corner, he ran into Cassie. Literally. His reflexes took over, and he fired square into her stomach. The sensor flashed red, and Erik kept running.

He paused behind a wall to catch his breath and await his next victim. But before he could aim, his sensors flashed. Someone had shot him. Apparently, waiting and standing still didn't pay. He silently followed his attacker, and when she stopped moving, fired. It was Penelope. She groaned as Erik ran off.

Erik liked this game. He was at last having fun on a date, although truthfully, he didn't see much of Raver. Hardly anyone could hit him, and he quickly became a professional. Before he knew it, the exit had opened, and the dark room was flooded with light. Erik made his way to the door, where he removed his vest and gun and went into the arcade to await his score.

The Project Phantomers amused themselves with the arcade games. They all crowded around Hikaze on DDR, watching the arrows on the screen and cheering. Raver sat with Erik. They were both tired, especially Erik. His strategy had been silence and speed, while most others crept carefully along the passages. Consequently, he was a lot more tired than the others. He slumped in a chair, and Raver slumped on him, leaning on his side. He was too tired to protest.

"That was fun," she murmured. Erik nodded in assent.

When they received the scores, no one was surprised to find that Erik had done best of all, followed by Raveene, Hikaze, Raver, Penelope, Cassie, and Nessa, in that order. They all felt happy, and glomped Erik goodbye as they left. Erik and Raver got back into their taxi and went back to the hotel. Erik couldn't help but think that that could have gone much, much worse.

………………………………

Nice long chapter for you! You know the drill – the mighty Button! Pressit!


	14. The Phantom Inspector

Whoo! That last chapter sure went over well. For those of you who want to know what a Project Phantom shirt looks like in my eyes (I'm planning to make one too), I'm going to try to put a pic on the Internet. I see them as black short-sleeved shirts with "Project Phantom" (one word over the other) centered in front written in Arial with a small white mask on the left side of the chest and a rose lying diagonal on the bottom right side. I'll tell you when I get the pic up, if you can't see it the way I do.

Hikaze Chimizu: Wow. I never knew Cameo City would be such a hit. That should be the title of a fic in itself. Hmm…(gets ideas) I wish I could hear Phantom randomly in the middle of a movie. Is anyone else disappointed that they cut out the fourth verse of the title song in the movie?

RaptorChick: I don't know where you'll get your cameo. I'm working them in as I go along. And…well, I've never met a phanboy and I hope I never do. Unless Christine has phanboys or something…but then, that wouldn't be a _phan_boy. Ugh…

MetaChi: Glad you liked it, but what's wrong with his cape? I find that Cape Mask Almighty Fedora Swooning Phangirls.

IcySunset: OH! (goes to add about ten people to author alert) I thought it was a bad thing, like reporting them breaking the rules or something.

Phantomraver: I'm so glad you enjoyed it! And yay, a long review! And yay, cookies! Squesome! WHOO! That is officially a word. Squesome…heh.

Eat-drums: Yeah…I love Antonio too. (My dad calls him Tony Flags, because that's what his name directly translated means.) I just can't see Erik with a Spanish accent. Hang on…O.O Nope, still can't see it.

Digimitsu: (sigh) My sincerest apologies, but no more dates. Cameo sufficient?

Kianra: Yeah, I went looking for it – I saw it one day and couldn't find it later. I felt sad because I figured they deleted it. (sigh) Same thing happened to me with this awesome anime fic I wrote. Script form. One of my fave fics is in script form, and I'm so scared they're going to delete it before it's over. (_The New Production_ by LesMisLoony – the Phantom characters act out LesMis. It's hilarious – read it!) Anyway, if you fix it and put it back, _then_ I'll read it. Oh – warning. Someone else just put up the first chapter of a fic called _When Phangirls Attack._ I think they stole your title. Too bad, because it was catchy. Just letting you know.

Raveene: Do you know _how_ close your description of the Project Phantom shirts comes to mine?! Weird…

Lazy.kender19: (gasp) I was trying to keep from using 'glomp' in phanfiction because I thought it was only an anime term, and I was afraid no one would know what it meant. Well, it basically means to literally jump on someone, hugging them hard. They frequently fall to the floor after being glomped, and if the person doing it is standing on stairs while the person they glomp isn't, they have an advantage. Also, you can't read anime, you watch it (they're cartoons). You read manga (anime in its original comic form). Anyway, that's what glomp means, for anyone who didn't know.

………………………….

"Hey Erik, guess what?" Erik opened his eyes the next day to find Aislin leaning over him, sprinkling water on him to wake him up.

"Go away, I want to sleep."

"Don't make me get the bucket, Erik." She'd dumped a bucketful of water on him to wake him up once before, but that time he had been unconscious. (A/N: It's true, I did that in LesMisLoony's _The New Production_.) Still, he didn't doubt she'd do it again, so he snapped awake. "What?"

"You only have five dates left!"

"Joy…" Erik rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. "How many have I had so far?"

Aislin's smile faded a bit in thought. "I dunno…" She pulled out the Almighty White Notebook. "Let's see…fourteen. Five of which came all at once."

Erik fell back into bed. Sleep would be a good thing right now… Fourteen…wow. The managers really ought to fear him now, if he could get through fourteen phangirls in one piece. If he counted the Project Phantomers that he'd come into contact with, it totaled over thirty! Erik smiled. He truly was amazing, if he did say so himself.

Bucket…

He sat up again.

"Crap." Aislin put the full bucket down. She'd been looking forward to that. "Oh, well. Anyway, today's date is relatively quiet. You're going shopping. Go downstairs – she's waiting for you in a taxi. And uh – I don't think she's too happy. I picked this date for your benefit, and I think she wanted to do something else. Anyway, here's some money if you want to buy stuff." She handed him a thick wallet stamped with a mask design and held the door open.

Erik stood confused for a moment, clutching the wallet. That was relatively gentle for Aislin. True, she'd threatened him with the bucket, but that was it. Shrugging, he stuffed the wallet in his pocket and headed downstairs to the waiting taxi.

A girl (who never gave the authoress a desc) sat sulking in the backseat. Erik climbed in, and the driver took off. "Hi."

She didn't talk for a moment. But then, the happiness of just being in the presence of Erik took over, and she grinned. "Hi. I'm Emerald SkyGoddess."

Erik blinked.

"Uh…Kay. Call me Kay."

"Alright. Do you know where exactly we're going?"

Kay snorted. "Shopping. I wanted to do something _cool_ but no, this is what I got. I heard the last girl got to go to _LaserQuest_ with you."

"Uh…yes. Yes we did."

"Hmph. Oh well. Can I buy some stuff for you?"

Erik hesitated. What, pray tell, did she want to get for him? "Oookay."

She grinned as they pulled up to a small building. They climbed out of the taxi, and through the dirty front doors.

Erik gasped. Heaven!

It was a costume store. This place was full of the most interesting things – flashing fake jewelry, capes in every color, sweeping old-fashioned dresses, tuxedoes, all kinds of hats, and costumes of every character you could imagine.

And a whole wall covered in masks!

Erik felt like he was backstage in the Opera House – times ten! This place had more costumes than even the Opera House, from movies, books, TV shows, and everything! There was even a Phantom of the Opera costume. Erik moved away from that one quickly – it weirded him out.

All of a sudden, Kay came up to him with her arms full of costumes. "They're all really expensive, but we can try them on. That'll be fun!"

Erik agreed. He pulled a couple of outfits off the racks and dashed to a cubicle to change.

He came out in a brown trenchcoat with a tall hat and thick sideburns. "Interesting." He stood before the mirror, hunched over and speaking with a French accent. Then he broke into song.

"_Valjean, at last, we see each other plain…M'sieur le Mayor, you'll wear a different chain…"_ His voice stretched down to hit the low note. At that moment, Kay emerged, in a flowing white angel costume. "Who are you supposed to be?"

Erik looked back at her. "I'm Javert."

She shrugged. "Okay." Erik headed back into the dressing room to try another outfit, while Kay admired her angel costume.

They put on all sorts of outfits – Erik was Saruman, a dementor, Tuxedo Mask (that one was too close to his own trademark outfit to be legal), a random wizard, and Napoleon. He felt too tall in the last one, and quickly got out of it. Kay tried on Arwen, some Japanese kimono with a sword, Catwoman, and, lo and behold, Christine. She'd thought Erik would like that one, but when he saw the white wedding gown, he turned and walked off.

Kay found him before the wall of masks. "Maybe I should go for a new look," he murmured.

"Nah," said Kay. "We all love you with the classic white mask. Although in the book –"

"It's a full black domino. Yes, I know. But it made it hard to breathe, and with Christine, breathing and singing became my priority. Could I have one of those, please? And a black fedora." The man behind the counter pulled down a white half-mask identical to the one Erik already wore and the hat and gave them to him.

"You've already got one of these."

"Yes, but my two spares were broken in…accidents, and if this one breaks, where will I be?"

"Uh…" the man behind the counter shrugged. "Without a mask. What does it matter?"

Erik paused. "You don't know who I am, do you?"

"Nope."

"Good." Erik turned to leave. "Wait…" He ran back to the dressing room to grab a costume. "I'll take this too."

The man rang up Erik's purchase. "You'll need to pay for that one too."

Erik looked around. "What one?"

"The one you're wearing. The Phantom of the Opera costume."

Erik blinked again. "But this is mine. I came in wearing it."

The man laughed. "Who goes around in a Phantom costume?"

"…The Phantom of the Opera?"

He stared at Erik. "Right. You tell me if you see him."

Erik was getting angry now. "I AM him!"

"Look, man, just pay for the costume."

"I'm not paying for my own clothes!" Erik pulled out his lasso and, as a frustrated last resort, ripped off his mask. The man screamed like a girl and backed up until he hit the wall, making five or six masks fall off. A porcelain one shattered. "Happy now?" Erik growled menacingly.

The man tittered incoherently. Erik sighed, left the money for his costume, fedora, and new mask and strode out with Kay, into the taxi and back to the hotel.

"And that, my friend, is how Joseph Buquet died."

Kay applauded. "He was an idiot. Why'd you buy a fedora? Don't you already have one?"

Erik shook his head. I never had one, but I saw pictures of actors in them and liked the way the look." He put it on, along with his original mask. "What do you think?"

Kay applauded again.

Erik left her at the doors, waving to each other, thinking, "That was enjoyable." He wasn't totally sure if he was being sarcastic or not. He opened the door to his room and found Aislin listening to her trusty Phantom CD. She saw him, screamed, and glomped him harder than anyone ever had.

"What the - ?"

Aislin grinned and hugged him more. "I love your new hat Erik."

He sighed. Great. All he did was make himself more attractive to his phangirls.

"What else did you buy?" she asked, pointing to his large bag.

"Uh, well, nothing really, just –" But Aislin had already pulled it from his hands and dumped it out on the bed. She grinned evilly.

"_Javert?!"_

………………………………………

That chapter was longer than I thought it would be. Hope you liked it! Review!


	15. Sing Once Again With Me

Sorry I took so long – I've spent more time reading than writing. Isn't it sad that this website doesn't allow Anne Rice fics? (I'm reading _The Vampire Lestat._)

IcySunset: O.O You…don't…like…_the fedora_? I adore his fedora! I just…never knew what it was called. So I just called it his hat. But when I read 'Erik's fedora' like, ten times in one fic, I got annoyed and decided to look it up. Heehee. Er – when authors/authoresses…what?

Han Futsu, Anti Normal: Well, the costume shop was supposed to be enjoyable, but the cashier was a jerk.

MetaChi: (gasp) I forgot about that! Grr…but the cape is still awesome. Anyway, I don't think Erik is too much in danger of getting caught in a plane engine or anything. (sniff) I like Sailor Moon. It was my first anime. Oh, and I just felt like sneaking in a LesMis reference. I can't really see Erik as Javert. I do think he'd make a good Saruman though.

PenelopeBlack13: O.O Sorry. Guess I missed that. Yeah, that was you. Autumn is prettier though.

Raveene: Yeah, but first I need the money to _make_ the shirts.

Eat-drums: Yes! That's my fave verse too! The strings, and the 'dun DUN' right before he starts singing again. And it's odd…that seems to be everyone's favorite Javert line…probably why I used it. (shrug)

Kianra: I haven't seen the LesMis play either (yet), but I read the book (long is right) and I have the two-disc soundtrack. Aw, poor you, suspended. Oh, and remember you once told me 'Let the Phantoms sing in the elevator'? Well, I couldn't let this fic end without taking your advice. Heehee.

Kojinka: I walked by a 21-and-over bar once (couldn't go in), a few weeks before Christmas, all in the spirit and stuff, and they were playing the title song on the piano and singing along. Totally got me OUT of the spirit – I hummed Phantom for the rest of the day.

SummerSong: Aw, thankies! I'm so glad you think so. I should do a sequel someday…hmm…is that too much of a good thing?

Spaci Ireth: Yup, sure. And you're my second Australian! Yay! (I like Australia. Would love to visit!)

Lackaz: Sure, you can have a cameo. To coin a phrase my friend Lessa uses, there will be a 'boatload' of cameos in the second to last chapter. I just decided a second ago. Wow. My fic's popular in Australia, isn't it?

Lendlaer: I defined 'glomp' in the last chapter, but that's okay. It's actually a term that mainly anime…people use, so I'm not surprised you don't know it. It means to pretty much jump on someone, hugging them to the point of suffocation. :) Fun to do, and shows a _lot_ of affection, but not very enjoyable.

Now here's a nice long chapter for you!

…………………………………

Erik gazed happily at his new costume. He wasn't wearing it at the moment. It was just lying on the bed. The sun was barely rising, and he was now in a very LesMis mood. He was considering ransacking Aislin's backpack until he found her soundtrack, but as he reached for it, she turned over and woke up.

"Erik?" She rubbed her eyes. "Why're you up so early?"

"No reason." He jerked his hand back.

"Okay, well, if you're ready and all, I can give you your information now. I'm still trying to go easy on you, so you're going to the bookstore."

"The BOOKSTORE?!"

"Oh, please, keep your hypnotic, sensual voice down, I just got up." She flumped forward onto Erik's chest. Some indistinct mumbling came from her.

"Sorry?" said Erik, pushing her upright.

"I said meet her downstairs by the hotel gift shop – not the Disney one – around nine."

"Nine o'clock?" That gave Erik about three hours to do whatever he wanted. "Alright then. And what are you going to do?"

"I'm going back to sleep, and then I'm going with you when you meet her."

"You're coming _with_ me?" What now? A chaperone? Like he _needed_ one?

"There are just some books I want to pick up. And a CD I ordered a couple of days ago." She snuggled back into her covers and was soon muttering happily deep in her dream. Erik turned away, planning to go down for breakfast, and maybe to find a video rental store.

"Oh, Erik…"

He turned back to Aislin. "Yes?" But she was still asleep. She was dreaming. Not daring to think about _what_ was going on in her dream, he carefully put away his precious Javert costume, picked up his new fedora, and left the room. (A/N: At Party City today – the place where I got my mask – I found a hat like Erik's! I was dancing around the empty aisle singing, "Sing once again with me our strange duet! Etc.")

Erik rode down in the elevator happily. No one stopped it to join him, as he was up even before the Disneyland parks opened. All of a sudden, the elevator shuddered to a halt.

Somewhere between the fifth and sixth floors.

Erik stood still for a moment, then pummeled every button on the panel that he could reach. He jumped up and down, trying to get it to move. Nothing happened.

Great. Well now he was stuck here.

Erik sank down to the tiled floor of the elevator. He might as well just wait to see what happened. The horrible elevator music continued to play from the speaker in the high corner. Erik clamped his hands over his ears. It kept coming, seeping through his fingers, as if it was _trying_ to torture him. He could hardly take it.

"YOU HAVE COME HERE…IN PURSUIT OF YOUR DEEPEST URGE…" He broke out randomly into song. Anything to shut out this horrid music. What was wrong with elevator composers?

He sang his verses, and when he reached the end, he sang Christine's verses too. By then he was really into it, doing it more for enjoyment than for distraction. Erik's versatile voice rang high in Christine's soprano notes, and he walked round and round the little room, gesturing and putting all his emotion into the lyrics.

"We've passed the point…of no…return…"

A faint sound seeped through the floor and ceiling, seemingly coming from both the fifth and sixth floors between which Erik's elevator was stuck. It sounded like rushing water.

"_Oh God, now the hotel's flooding_," he thought wildly. But, no, the elevator shifted a bit, going down to the fifth floor, and the doors opened.

Erik was greeted by a large group of hotel guests, all crowded around the opening, applauding. Hands reached in to pull him out. "Wait, I need to get to the lobby!" Erik cried, but no one seemed to hear him.

"Brilliant!" shouted a young woman. "You should be on the stage!"

"I've never heard such singing!" cried one astonished old man.

"Where's the woman who was singing with you?" wondered a small boy.

"We would have opened the elevator for you before," explained the old man, "but we all wanted to wait for the song to end. The sixth floor guests really enjoyed it too."

"We've booked you a night in the hotel lounge!" piped another young man.

"What? No! I –" But the guests wouldn't take no for an answer. Apparently he was to spend an hour or two in the hotel lounge tomorrow night singing. No one cared to listen to Erik now that he'd stopped singing, so, with the reflexes he'd developed avoiding the managers in the Opera, he quickly slipped out of the mob, found a working elevator, and went down to the lobby.

He gratefully ate his long-awaited breakfast, but now only had one and a half hours until he was to meet his date. That didn't leave him enough time to find a video store which he wasn't even sure existed within hotel range, so he decided to explore the lower levels of the hotel.

Going downstairs, he found a gym, an ice cream parlor, and some other things he didn't think anyone on vacation would ever need. Like a live-in lawyer. He made a mental note to check out the gym later, and strolled into the ice cream parlor.

Mmm…vanilla. He'd been needing something like this for days. Erik paid for his cone, and sat at one of the small round tables to eat it.

A scary looking girl came into the ice cream shop. She was short, with short black hair and bangs dyed purple. Piercings glittered all over her body, and tattoos ran up her arms. She wore black pants and an artfully ripped black shirt. In other words, she was the very picture of gothic.

Not bothering to take her headphones off, she just pointed at the flavor she wanted, then paid and sat down near Erik. She looked up and found him staring at her. "Hey, Erik!" she said loudly. She moved to sit at his table and, finally taking off her headphones, shook his hand. "Didn't think I'd meet you until later. I'm Mimi."

_Seriously?_ Erik continued to stare. _Her name's not…Spike or something?_

She continued eating her ice cream, still smiling in a much friendlier way than one would have expected from looking at her. "We're going to the bookstore, right? Not the kind of action I'd hoped for, but then, I'm not in charge." She frowned. "Don't know how that Aislin girl got in charge, come to think of it."

After half an hour or so of attemped conversation, in which there was much licking of ice cream and not much talking, Erik and Mimi stood up together.

"Well, I suppose we ought to get going," Erik said lightly. They made their way back up to the lobby, where they started into a taxi.

"WAIT!"

Aislin came running out of the hotel, her backpack swinging off her shoulder. "You're early! We aren't supposed to leave for another thirty minutes!" But she climbed into the front seat anyway, allowing Erik and Mimi the back. She remained respectfully silent, pretending that she wasn't there to disturb them.

Not as if there was anything to disturb. Both Mimi and Erik seemed to be naturally introverted, and did not spend much time talking. The taxi pulled up in front of Barnes and Noble, and the three of them went inside.

"Meet me here in two hours. You can buy whatever, just make sure you can carry it, I'm not helping. I won't be hanging around you." She started off to the music section of the store, and promptly got distracted by a large display Erik couldn't see.

"Come on." Mimi led him off to the side, where there was a large shelf of horror novels and classics.

Picking through the books, after about twenty minutes of searching, she selected four or five – _Dracula_ and _Frankenstein_ among them – and settled down on a squashy chair to read. When she was settled, Erik left to find something to interest himself.

There didn't seem to be anything much he felt like reading. He made his way over to a small shelf with very colorful books. He scanned the titles. Some were really odd, and others nigh unpronounceable.

"_Angel Sanctuary_," he murmured, pulling it off the shelf.

To his surprise, he discovered it was a well drawn, black-and-white comic book. Erik rushed through the first half of the story in ten minutes, and found it to be one of the darkest, most fascinating things he'd ever read.

Erik had discovered manga.

He loaded himself down with the first three books in the _Angel Sanctuary_ series, and then began to explore other titles. He took the first two or three books from every series he started, in case he couldn't find them later. Along with _Angel Sanctuary_, he now had _Inuyasha, Yu-Gi-Oh, Naruto, Rurouni Kenshin, _and_ Trigun._ Struggling to keep the stack of twenty or so graphic novels steady, he staggered back to Mimi.

"Manga, huh?" she said calmly, closing her book and getting ready to leave with him. "I can see you've never read any before. Good for you!"

Erik and Mimi paid for their books, and waited by the doors for Aislin.

"Where is she?" muttered Erik, straining to look at Mimi's watch. "She should have been here by now."

Just then, a large stack of books with legs came running up to them. It was Aislin, skillfully holding her stack in place. "Here I am!" she said proudly.

"Do you do this often?" wondered Erik, examining the pile of books she'd set lovingly on the floor.

"Only when I have money," she replied, shrugging, as Erik perused the titles.

"_Cracking the Da Vinci Code…Working with Your Chakras…The Vampire Lestat…Angels and Demons…Queen of the Damned…_Wow, you really got busy. And CDs?

"Yup. The Michael Crawford one I ordered is out of stock," she said disgustedly, "but they had my L'arc-en-Ciel CD."

"Who?" said Erik and Mimi together.

"A Japanese band," said Aislin shortly. "Come on, let's go."

They got into the waiting taxi to head back to the hotel, all three of them opening a book to begin reading. Mimi closed hers when she got out of the car, and Erik closed his when he walked into the glass door with it. But Aislin maneuvered around the hotel with her book in front of her nose with all the years of practice of a bookworm.

Mimi said goodbye to Erik with a smile, and got into the elevator with Aislin. She looked around it, and laughed.

"Hey, Erik, I heard you're doing a show tomorrow night."

Erik blushed.

…………………………………….

Well, that was officially my longest chapter yet. Hope you're happy now, Hilary. Review!


	16. The Music of the Lounge Room

Over 200 reviews! O.O I've only ever _dreamed_ of writing fics this popular!!!

New chappie! Hm…Aislin is running out of date ideas. Heh. I'm speaking in the third person! I find myself doing that more and more lately, and not just because I'm rereading the book. No wait…I remember now. I already had the idea for this chapter. I had it when I wrote the last one. Heh. Sorry.

IcySunset: A load of people seemed to like that line! Weird.

Moonlightrosegoddess: Okay…yay for lazy.kender! She's awesome, right? (somewhere out there, Hilary beams and trips over something)

MetaChi: Yes, I know. Neither does Anne McCaffrey. What's with Annes not liking fanfiction? Hate Pokemon – but TR are the only people I remotely like from it. Yes, all cameos will be in second to last chappie. And, well, Party City has something _like_ fedoras, at least. Does a fedora curve up at the back? (Or front? I didn't know how to wear it.)

Loverly16: Yeah! Hyde rocks! And…what's wrong with YGO? It's my fave anime…I thought the dark spirits and mind games would suit him.

Eat-drums: Heh. That part's awesome. I don't know all the words, so when I sing it, I do some Javert, then randomly switch to Valjean, and go back and forth.

Goddess of the Neon Rose: Uh, well…the situation I have planned isn't really pony friendly, but I'll work you in somehow.

ButterflyOfLothlorien: Yeah, and I had an awesome idea for a Lestat fic. I'm now due to read _Queen of the Damned._

Lendlaer: On the contrary, I find many loners are 'anime types.'

Raveene: Hm, didn't think of that. Angel Sanctuary is a right-to-left manga, I should have thought of that!

Artymas: Sure, cameo for you too.

Songwind: Yay for AS! Kira rocks!

Lackaz: (runs from a plague of dreaded Something) You've been to Japan?! I HATE you! Well, no, I love you actually. What was it like? They really say komiku? O.o Then what's with American Japanophiles saying manga?

MortRouge: Sorry. I guess it's just the way I talk. I'll try to focus on how Erik would talk. Sometimes it just fits the situation, though.

……………………………..

The next day, Erik was surprised to find that Aislin had allowed him to sleep until one in the afternoon. He snapped up. "Aislin!" She poked her head out of the bathroom, where she was busy brushing her hair. "Don't I have to be somewhere?"

"Oh, yes Erik, nice to see you've taken a responsibility," she said with a grin, sweeping her long brown hair over her shoulder, where it covered as much of her face as Erik's mask. She continued brushing. It looked painful.

"You _had_ a date scheduled for tonight, but because of…certain circumstances, I've changed the destination. Wear your best…tuxedo, fix up your mask, and do the best you can with your hair." She flipped hers back, and disappeared into the bathroom again.

"It's a wig," muttered Erik. "When do I need to be ready?"

"Seven o'clock," she answered.

"Then why are you getting ready so early?" Erik pulled his one unwrinkled tux out of the closet and began to straighten it out, hanging it on the closet door for later.

"I have…a lunch appointment. It's extremely important that I be there, so I need to hurry and get ready. I'll come back up to change for dinner later tonight. Do what you like, just meet me in the lobby at six."

Dinner later? Lunch with someone? Well, now Erik was confused.

Aislin emerged in her standard black pants and shirt. Give her a cape and mask and she'd be a female Erik. "See you in a few hours," she said resignedly, and, as if bracing herself for something terrible, she headed out.

She took a hooded blue cloak with her.

"What's that for?" asked Erik.

"Don't want to be seen," she replied lightly.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

About an hour later, she sat at a small table in Chili's, at a location not far from the hotel, idly stirring her hot tea. Her hood was pulled up over her eyes. A handsome young man sat across from her, sipping something alcoholic Aislin didn't care to identify.

"So you see," she said, sounding much harsher and more disdainful than she did around Erik, "I need you there in about five hours. Be aware that you could be putting yourself in grave danger."

"Why should I come?" he said suspiciously.

"Because I have connections, and a really good kick, if I do say so myself. If you don't show, shall we say, a disaster beyond your imagination will occur. The ones you love may also be at risk."

The man's eyes widened. Aislin's everyday, threatening voice (which she normally used all the time, but hadn't gotten much exercise lately) had done its work. As she was enjoying it, she continued.

"I'm not above murder, or torture. Anyway, who would care? I'm surprised I'm even talking to you, you should be grateful." The slightest bit ashamed, she tugged the hood closer.

She stood up, and the man followed suit. "You'll be there," she snarled, in a voice Erik would have been proud of, and swept away from the table.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Later that night, Erik waited in the lobby for Aislin, wondering what was taking her this long. The elevator opened, and she emerged.

Aislin had not abandoned her trademark black, but she wore a kind of floating dress that went down to the floor with bell sleeves. Her hair was gently waved, and she could have passed for anything from goddess to witch. Erik didn't gasp, but his eyebrows did go up a bit.

"You clean up well," he said, in his normal tone, with a smile.

"Come on," she said, and led him to a dark, smoky room he'd never noticed. It was full of small round tables and comfy armchairs. There was a bar on the far left side of the room. At the back of the room was a small, circular platform with a shiny black piano…and a microphone stand.

"Oh, no," protested Erik, attempting to back out of the room. "I'm not –"

"Hi!" A tall, slim girl with short blond hair with the tips dyed blue and dark blue eyes waved happily to Erik, randomly popping up at his side. Before he'd even had time to think to himself _Lovely, another deathly hyper one_, she seemed to think better of herself, and grew very subdued. She solemnly held out her hand. "How do you do?"

A little taken aback, Erik shook her hand. "Very well, thanks."

"This is Hana, Erik. She's technically your date for tonight, but she's also going to be your singing partner."

"I'm sorry?" Erik turned, puzzled, to Aislin.

"Yes. You recall that show you were supposed to do? Well, I organized it for you. Oh, I didn't plan it," she said hurriedly, as Erik glared daggers at her for getting him into this. "You're the one who went and sang in the elevator. But I figured I'd just…work out the order of the show for you. You're doing songs from popular musicals, and in any duets with women, Hana here will sing with you. I'm on piano," she said disgustedly. It was obvious she'd rather sing with Erik – any phangirl's dream, of course.

Walking up to the platform, she stepped up to the mike and began to speak, Erik and Hana behind her. The audience all looked up at her and clapped. Many of the audience members were from the crowd that had listened to Erik in the elevator. They cheered loudest, bar the random phangirl in the table nearest the platform.

"I'M RAPTOR CHICK ERIK!!! WHOO!!!"

Aislin grinned. "Welcome guests to the special, one night only show of Erik, the Phantom of the Opera. Only phangirls –" Raptor cheered "and those of you at the elevators yesterday can know how heavenly his voice is." Erik blushed as red as the satin lining of his cape. "I give you Erik!"

Claps and random screams filled the little room as Erik stood awkwardly behind the mike stand and Aislin took her seat at the piano. "Feel free to play your own songs whenever you like," she whispered.

"Well, er…hello. I suppose you know who I am now, so I'll just get this show on the road, as they say. Is there no specific order of songs?" Aislin shook her head.

"Perform the ones on this list." She handed him a slip of paper with twelve songs on it. "Do them in any order, but do them all. I know you know them all."

Erik scanned the list. "Well, we might as well start things off with a classic." He smiled. "Let me introduce my…friend, Hana. She will be singing my female accompaniment. I'm sure you will recognize this as the elevator song." He nodded at Aislin, who grinned and played a short intro for him to get ready.

"_You have come here…in pursuit of your deepest urge…"_ Erik lost all feelings of embarrassment or protest when he sank into the music. Aislin plunked a few wrong notes at times, but hey, her strong point was singing, not piano. Hana beamed at him all through his verse, and then came in magnificently on Christine's. Their voices blended beautifully on the last few lines, and everyone applauded.

"I LOVE YOU ERIK!!!"

Erik was in his element now. Music was his only constant passion.

Ignoring the constantly random shouts of Raptor, he worked his way through two solos (Stars and Love Changes Everything) and another duet with Hana (All I Ask of You).

"Now…well, I'd _like_ to do the Confrontation between Javert and Valjean, but I don't have another male singer…"

"Oh…" He turned to Aislin, who he'd forgotten was accompanying his voice. "Yeah…about that Erik. You won't like it any more than I do. I got a man to sing those songs with you, but…" Sighing, she dragged herself up to the mike. With no feeling at all, she said, "May I introduce Erik's male partner…Raoul de Chagny."

Smiling more than he should in that situation, Raoul sidled up to the stage. Erik turned eyes full of hatred on him. "I must sing with _you_?"

Aislin looked truly sorry. "I didn't know who else to get."

"Anyone else," muttered Erik. "Look, vicomte, no talking, just sing the part and don't mess me up."

"I take it you're playing Valjean?" Raoul said.

"Javert," Erik replied coldly. And he glared at Aislin, who promptly began the music.

"Valjean, at last, we see each other plain…" 

It was hard to decide if the Confrontation was as exciting as usual with Raoul playing Valjean, even if Erik was doing a splendid Javert.

"Right, well…up next, I'll be performing I Dreamed a Dream…what?" That was a girl's song! Sighing, and ignoring Raoul's sniggers, Erik performed the song admirably…omitting the 'he slept a summer' verse.

He moved on. Hana sang the title song of Phantom well, and Erik got a little too into that one with his _"Sing, my Angel of Music!"_ Aislin surrendered the piano to him both for a break and to calm him down a bit, as he played his own accompaniment for Music of the Night, which received great cheers from the crowd and another "I LOVE YOU ERIK!" from Raptor.

He continued with Do You Hear the People Sing, handling the three solo verses with Raoul and Hana playing the chorus, and All I Care About, with Hana's lone voice as the group of girls. Erik rounded off the night with Razzle Dazzle, and an extremely moving rendition of Empty Chairs at Empty Tables.

The audience cheered, and came up to congratulate him on his lovely voice. Not used to being so appreciated for his musical abilities, Erik smiled nervously as they shook his hand again and again. Hana waved goodbye, expressing how much she'd enjoyed herself but that she desperately needed something to drink. He dodged a glomp from Raptor as she exited. He glowered at Raoul, who was attempting to slip out without catching Erik's eye, but failed. Raoul squeaked and fled, screaming loudly as Raptor ambushed him outside. Erik ignored the cries of "Die fop!" and smirked.

Aislin rose from the piano and stretched. "I'm tired…Coming up to the room, Erik?"

"Erm…" He hesitated. "I'll be there in a few minutes…or so. I'm going to get a drink." Aislin bid him goodnight, and left.

Erik paid for his wine and glanced at the stage. No other performer had arrived, and even if they did…he could just leave, right?

He tentatively walked back to the stage and seated himself at the gleaming black piano. So long he'd gone without his music…his organ…and his opera…

Erik lifted the cover, and began to play again for his own enjoyment, and that of anyone who might be listening.

…………………………..

There's a nice long chappie for you all. We're drawing nearer to the end, people! I'm sad. Still, there's a good four chapters left, I think. Maybe five, if I can stretch it out. Who will be the winner? Don't ask me, I'm still figuring it out. Review! Push the Mighty Purple Button!


	17. Lions and Tigers and Erik Oh My!

Two days after I updated (this was on Saturday), I was frantically checking my e-mail for reviews every five minutes, because I wasn't getting any. I was really depressed – I had thought it was a good chappie, and no reviews. _Then_ I read the note on the website saying that the e-mail systems were down. (feels stupid) Apparently I really do survive on reviews, because I was going crazy before I realized I already had seven or so.

Lendlaer: You can never have enough cameos! I welcome you! (bows and falls)

Lackaz: I have not gotten your e-mail. (waits expectantly and then gets sad) Nope, still not here. Glad you liked it. I wanted Erik to do songs with guys and couldn't think of any other plausible person.

Eat-drums: Not over 'til it's over, nope nope. ;)

Songwind: O.o I can tell you right not, Raoul is not going to win in any way. Neither is music – Erik can't marry music. Not to say he has to marry the winner. It's not the Bachelor. Gosh, I hate that show.

Willow Rose: Oh, sorry, I can't take any more. I had a lot. O.O But you can have a cameo. Might be small, but better than nothing, eh?

KT: A zoo, eh? Hmm… (gets ideas)

MortRouge: I like imagining them competing in the Confrontation scene. (thinks about it and grins) And tell me, was Erik's dialogue any better in chapter 16?

Kianra: Aislin the Pregnant Gazelle! Wait…O.o Ooh, I hope my gazelle got pregnant from Erik…Heehee. Wrong thoughts. Anyway, I'm very flattered, in an odd way. I feel like I know you by now, and so you know me! Yay, we're all Internet buddies!

Enigmatic mystery: No more dates, but cameos welcome. (realizes she has run out of room in the cameo paper and writes 'enigmatic mystery' sideways)

LinhDog: Germany! I want to go there! Wow – I've gained worldwide fame, haven't I? Will you all read my novel when it's published? Not that is has anything to do with Phantom…

……………………….

"Hey Erik, guess what?" Aislin popped randomly in front of Erik as he ate the French toast room service had brought him. He didn't speak.

"Oh, come on Erik, don't be mad at me!" Aislin begged desperately. "There was no other alternative! I wanted your concert to be a success! Think of what I had to go through! I had to eat _lunch_ with that guy! Do you know how hard it is to eat with that fop staring back at you?!"

Erik turned to her. "You had to choose a man to sing with _me_, and you choose the one person in the world I hate more than anyone?"

"I'm sorry! Who would you have chosen?"

Erik didn't answer. True, spending the last few years of his life in a cellar, he didn't know of many other male singers that could work with him. "Still, what if I had lost my temper and killed him? You know how I can be that way – if you have a problem, Punjab it."

"We would have applauded!"

Erik finally smiled a little, and Aislin sighed. "What was this you wanted to tell me?" he inquired.

"Today's date destination was provided by a phan."

"I was under the impression that you came up with all the ideas."

"I did," she said sheepishly, "but my brain is rather dry at the moment. So I'll use this idea. You're going to the zoo."

"The zoo?" Erik stared at her. "Why?"

"Because I'm running out of ideas." She grinned. "Hey, you know yesterday's girl's Internet name was MortRouge?"

"Red Death?" There was a blatant reference to something Erik-related.

"Yeah, but never mind, today your date's name is a nice normal Rachel."

Erik suddenly realized something. "Aislin – you gave me the girl's name and our destination ahead of time! Normally you leave me in suspense!"

"Oh – do you like it better that way?"

"No, no, no!" He shook his head vigorously. "It was just a change."

"Yeah, I figured you ought to know. I feel bad about doing so much to you in such a short space of time. You're ready right? Get going, she's downstairs in the lobby." Erik grabbed his fedora and the second _Angel Sanctuary_ and walked out of the room.

"Goodbye."

Aislin waved, lying down on the bed as the door shut. "I feel bad, but not that bad." She smiled both evilly and fondly, and got up to change for the pool.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

Erik was rather confused by this 'right to left' method of reading. When he first opened a manga, with the spine on the left, a page glared at him saying "YOU'RE READING THE WRONG WAY!" Quite a rude awakening. This page told him that in traditional Japanese books, they read from right to left, so the spine if on the right and the panels of the comic go this way. It took some getting used to, turning the pages the wrong way. If he let his guard down while reading, he'd turn the page on the right side, and be faced with the page he'd just finished reading.

Erik felt he was getting the hang of it, though. And as he read, his scheduled date came up to him and watched him read. Unaware, Erik continued to struggle with his pages. She crouched under his book to look at the title.

"_Angel Sanctuary_?" she murmured, and Erik jumped. "Didn't know you were into incest." (A/N: Hana's words.) A young couple strolling by turned to stare at this word, and Erik turned red, even though they couldn't see through the mask anyway. He closed his book.

"Hi! I'm Rachel!" Rachel (who provided no desc, and therefore is entirely fabricated) was very pale, and had short blond hair. Her gray eyes twinkled as they scanned Erik admirably. "And we're going to the zoo!"

She was rather hyper. Erik, resigned to another glomp-happy phangirl, allowed himself to be dragged out of the hotel and into a taxi by the hand. Rachel then spent the full fifteen-minute drive to the zoo staring at the hand that had touched Erik's. Which, really, didn't mean much, as Erik was wearing gloves, like he always did.

The first thing Erik noticed about the zoo was that it stank. He thought the cellars of the Paris Opera had some rank smells, but he'd never been here.

Rachel seemed immune to it. "Let's go see the bears!" she squealed.

Well, Erik was definitely not meant to be in a zoo. There was a short time when he found a spot shaded by trees where he thought he could rest, but there was a nasty splat on his shoulder, and only then did he discover why no one else dared walk under the branches. In a foul mood already, the lasso did its work, and the zoo was…well, minus one poor birdie. Erik tore out of there as fast as his feet could carry him before the zookeeper could show up, with Rachel rushing after.

She walked silently beside him, mourning the bird while he cleaned his cape off disgustedly, for all of two minutes, until she looked up and cried, "Ooh! Lions!"

And tigers too. Fascinated by the big cats, who were in the process of attacking lunch, Erik leaned over the railing, watching.

"They're so lethal…"

Luckily, Rachel was able to predict this misfortune, and pulled Erik back by his cape before he became dessert.

There was also an incident in the reptile house, when as Erik and Rachel gazed upon a poisonous rattler, a large Brazilian boa constrictor somehow escaped its glass container and slithered across the tile floor.

Erik swore he heard the snake say something as it slithered away – it had to be the snake, who else could have such a hissy voice? But Rachel maintained that nothing had been spoken in such a voice. Something about Brazil…Erik contemplated it for a few minutes, but didn't mention it again.

They moved on to some mammals, where antelope, gazelles, and deer-like creatures of all kinds each had their own enclosures. Looking at the gazelles, Rachel pointed them out.

"That one's named Hilary and that one's Riadah…and that's Aislin…and that's you."

"I'm sorry?"

"Yeah, that fourth gazelle is Erik." Erik the Human stared at Erik the Gazelle, and then turned fiery eyes on Rachel. She backed away. "Hey, don't look at me, I didn't name them."

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful. Lunch, then insects, fish, elephants, and the petting zoo. Rachel tried to entice a llama to come nearer with a handful of smelly pellets while Erik stayed clear.

All in all, as he and Rachel sipped soda from giant plastic souvenir cups, it had been a very interesting day. And the Phantom determined that he was definitely not an animal person.

……………………………….

I had a dream once where I met Erik in a zoo. Don't ask me why it was a zoo, but it was, I remember. I had prayed to God for a visit from the Angel of Music that night. Erik wasn't like he normally was (mask and all), he took the form of an Asian teenager. For reference, I have a bit of an Asian fetish – I think Japanese guys are totally hot – so I think Erik was taking the form of the kind of person I find most attractive in my dream. He's really an angel now, so he is as handsome as I make him. And the next day was the first day I hit Christine's high note. So the Angel is real, people, and he's Erik. Pray for him, and he'll come. Review!


	18. Karaoke Ghost

I invented a disease! I only just realized I had it. It's called ALAC – Authoress Loneliness and Abandonment Complex. It's a mental problem in which, if an authoress is deprived of reviews for over two days, she becomes very depressed and neglected. Sadly, it's chronic and incurable, but help me hold off the effects!

Glad my chapters are going over so well…I'm having fun writing this. As soon as it's over, I'll have to spit out another humor phic to satisfy my fans. Heehee…I have fans!

Phantomraver: It does fit him well, doesn't it? HP are my favorite books, and I'm proud I could make a little reference. The gazelle names come from a game played by Kara (Kianra) – she told my about them in a review. Yeah, I have an Angel! Isn't it awesome! (gets all dreamy)

Phoenixthemenace: I like that round two idea, but I don't want my fans to get sick of the same old storyline. (Tell me, is it possible?) I'm considering doing a "Life With the Winner" fic though – the winning girl moves into the cellar and we follow their life for a while. But I don't have many ideas for that.

Lazy.kender19: I meant hope you're happy that I finally updated, not because of chapter length. More phangirls would have been there if they'd known about the show. It's not something Erik's going to make public, now is it? And I thought it was funny to just throw one random one in there. …I thought the gazelles were funny. (grins)

Graymoon74: (In response to ch.1 review) Not nice, yes, but it is Raoul, after all. Not nice, yet funny, and most of all, stupid.

Songwind: I didn't think you were really implying an E/R pairing anyway. I hate slash myself, or yaoi/yuri where I come from – Anime Universe. (For all you strictly English readers, yaoi are boy/boy pairings, and yuri are girl/girl.) It was shorter – I never know how long the chapters are going to be until I write them. If I scrape four pages on MicWord (including reader replies), I'm happy.

Willow Rose: I'd like to use that, but…oh. If I use it, the fic will be one chapter longer. Okay then! Ooh…cool. It's like he was visiting your bedside or something. Maybe when he died he_ became_ the legendary Angel and does all the things that the Angel in Daddy Daae's stories did. We should poll people who have been visited by ghostly, angelic beings singing to them.

Kianra: Yay! Internet buddies! (dances in an OOC way) I don't know what you didn't do, but okay.

Lackaz: The zoo wasn't my idea, it was a phan's. I'm using phan suggestions for the last dates. (gasp) There aren't even date_s_ plural left! This is the last one! There's still two chapters though. So no more suggestions.

Lendlaer: It took _years_ of practice (and I'm only 15) and a visit from the Angel. O.o

Raveene: …gnitirw sdrawkcab eciN

Han Futsu, Anti Normal: "BE FREE!!!" I can't get that image out of my head, that's hilarious! And thanks for believing me, it's 100 true.

LinhDog: You too shall have a cameo, my friend.

………………………….

Aislin met Erik late the next morning with a large plate of toast and different jams, grinning as if it were Christmas. He shook himself awake and took a piece. Aislin continued to beam almost proudly.

"What is the occasion, pray tell?" muttered Erik, spreading his toast with blackberry jam.

"Ready for it, Erik?" She seemed really excited. "Drumroll please…" Looking around, she saw neither a drum nor a roll, so she started drumming her hands on the desk by the bed. "Erik…today is the day of your final Love of His Life date!"

Erik dropped his toast on the floor. "Really? This will be the last one?" Happiness flooded through him. No more rabid phangirls! No more glomping, no more being forced to sing, no more shattered masks…the contest would be over! Then he remembered what the term 'contest' really meant.

"Aislin, tell me…what do I do when this contest ends?"

She dusted off his toast and set it on the table. "There's a ceremony where you consider all the entrants and select one to be the Love of Your Life, as per the title…the chosen girl goes with you to a romantic vacation spot for two weeks and together you test out your potential relationship. Oh, well actually…" She hesitated, as Erik's heart sank farther and farther with every word. Two weeks stuck with a phangirl…

Aislin started speaking again. "Well, we polled phangirls, and they all say that instead of going on a vacation with you, they'd much rather move into the house on the lake. So you'll try your relationship out for a weekend in that romantic vacation spot, then spend the rest of the two weeks back at the Opera House."

Erik stood tall and threatening. "I am _not_ letting a phangirl move into my house. I draw the line there."

Aislin shrugged. "Let her live in the lake, then, but those are the rules. Anyway, for your last date, you'll be off to a dance club."

"I'm sorry?"

"You heard me – Club Cherry. Better than the name sounds – dark, full of that kind of gothic people you and I fit in with so well. Girl's name is Cassandra – heh, means 'inflaming men with love' – but you can go ahead and call her Butterfly, it's her nickname. She's going to meet you at the club, so go ahead and get over to it. Taxi's waiting." She handed Erik a new piece of toast and ushered him toward the door.

Aislin stopped. "On second thought, this is my kind of club. Think I'll go too." She quickly changed into a tight, knee-length black dress, with a zipper up to the stiff, high collar. She snapped the collar together, slipped into her black boots, and flipped her hair over her shoulder before striding out the door past Erik. Blinking confusedly, he took his cape and hat and followed her out.

Club Cherry was a shadowy little hole-in-the-wall difficult to notice if you weren't actually looking for it. The walls were dark, dusty brick, and the wooden door was done in chipping green paint. No one was checking IDs at the door.

"You don't have one anyway," Aislin told Erik, "and it's not an overage bar or something. IDs checked for drinks, but that's all."

Inside, the atmosphere was just as dark as the lighting. On one side of the room, there were lots of small, round tables surrounded by hard wooden chairs. These were lined up around a long bar stretching from wall to wall on the right side. Girls in purple miniskirts tended the bar. On the other side was an empty space full of people doing odd dances to rock music played from a DJ situated in the back corner. Comfy beanbag chairs were scattered around the dance floor at a safe distance. People sat reading books they'd brought with them, or some taken from a small dusty shelf by the DJ. They all seemed skilled at tuning out all other sounds. Red, blue, and purple lights flashed incessantly around the room. One flash illuminated several doors at the back of the building that led to karaoke rooms.

Evanescence seemed prevalent among the songs being played, and Aislin recognized Everybody's Fool when it started. "I'll be seeing you Erik," she shouted. "Come find me when you want to leave." She found herself a beanbag from which to listen – Aislin was not a dancing person.

"Hello!"

Erik turned to see a girl of sixteen or so waving from a round table near the bar. He made his way over to her. "Butterfly?"

"That's me." They were farther from the dance floor here, and didn't have to shout as loudly. She was pale, with blue-green eyes and short brown hair.

A bar girl came up to them. She had piercings in her nose and three times in each ear, with orange hair, and reminded Erik strongly of Mimi.

"What'll it be?" she asked, in a sweeter voice than Erik would have thought likely. Lacking IDs, Erik and Butterfly just got fruit juices. Cherries with the stems still attached floated in the glasses – apparently this is where the club's name came from.

After their drinks were no more, Butterfly wanted to go and dance. "I do not dance," Erik protested, but Butterfly dragged him out of his seat and across to the dance floor.

At once, he began to feel out of place. It was one thing to be uncomfortable, but here, he felt just plain stupid. He didn't trust himself to dance like these people, and simply standing here looked dumb. Butterfly attempted to get him to move his body, but made no progress. He moved away from her and the dancers and collapsed into an empty beanbag, sinking a little too far in for comfort.

Butterfly came over to him. "If you're not comfortable dancing, we can go somewhere else. I know there's a karaoke room reserved for our use if we want it – would you rather sing?"

This worked out for two people, two ways. Erik was much more confident in his singing abilities, and would definitely be comfortable doing karaoke, especially if no one else was listening. Butterfly, on the other hand, would be able to listen to the Phantom of the Opera sing. Everybody wins!

They headed to their little soundproof room, which instantly shut out all the noise of the dance floor. It had a square table surrounded by cushions in front of a small stage with two microphones and a TV screen meant for lyrics. Butterfly began to flip through the CD selection.

A few minutes later, she threw an empty case across the room in frustration, narrowly missing Erik as it hit the wall and broke in two. "There's no Phantom! There's no musicals at all!"

Erik had rarely ever sung anything other than his genres of opera and musicals. What would he do here, where all the selections were rock songs?

"Here, try this." Butterfly tossed him a Maroon5 CD. "Nothing here seems your style, so let's try you out on 'She Will Be Loved.'"

As Erik didn't know the words, he was forced to follow the lyrics on the screen as they lit up. He had never heard the song, but it was rather pretty, and he performed it well.

Butterfly had fun selecting songs for Erik to perform, some of which were completelt wrong for him, but all of which he had to try, as he had no clue what they would sound like beforehand. In turn, he began giving sings to Butterfly to sing, which he chose at random, enjoying the results. They even did a few duets, but there weren't many available.

After an hour or so, when their voices were tired, they headed back out to the roar of the dance club, and got more cherry-adorned drinks to soothe their throats. They didn't speak for a while.

They talked then, about pretty much anything. First, they discussed the ridiculous volume of the music – it was hurting Erik's ears. Then they contemplated music and movies, which had to be explained to Erik. After a few more minutes and another round of drinks, Butterfly chanced a look at her watch, gasping that she was late for a piano lesson. She quickly glomped Erik, and a little embarrassed, waved and departed.

Erik downed the last of his juice, and went to find Aislin.

He found her, with a book at her side, singing along with the music being played. When she saw him, she hopped up and left with him, continuing to sing as they exited and the music faded away.

"_Watching me, wanting me, I can feel you pull me down…_" Erik was left with these dark thoughts pulling _him_ down as they made their way back to the hotel, where Erik took a nice long bath happily.

It was almost over…soon, he could be back in his homey little cellar…with his music…and…depressing memories of Christine. He sat up. Perhaps Aislin was right. Maybe he really did need to get his mind off Christine. Perhaps he did need a companion.

………………………………..

It's nearly over! (cries) We'll be making another stop in Cameo City next chapter. All the reviewers are wondering, "What could happen now that the dates are over?" Review and find out! Oh! Also, all those who I promised a cameo, please submit the real name you want used – made up or otherwise. WHO WILL ERIK CHOOSE?! I've already picked the winner! Heheh…REVIEW!


	19. The Phangirl Invasion

Heh. Hate to disappoint you all, but you won't find out the winner until next chapter. Heheh. And now, many of you are going, "Then what could be happening in this chapter, Aislin? Tell us so!" Well, you'll find out. (Thanks to everyone who read my new one-shot! It made some of you cry…I have the power to draw both tears and laughter! Seriously, I never thought it was enough to make anyone cry.)

Eat-drums: Really? (is sad) Sorry…I have a lot of reviews, it's hard to keep track. I really did look hard, though. Here, have a cookie.

ButterflyofLothlorien: I'm glad I portrayed you well! It's always nice when you see yourself in a fanfic exactly as you are.

Kianra: Nope…(sigh)...I'm not an actual contestant. I wish I could win, though. Yay! Same grade.

Raveene: Hey, I like their new stuff! If you mean Origin, I can't find it anywhere. (shakes finger reprovingly) You had your turn! I still have…(counts)…twelve people to cameo! BTW, you won Kianra's When Erik's Phangirls Attack.

MetaChi: …Wouldn't it? (sigh) And I'm forming a support group (in a way) as we speak. I'll give you the website link when I'm done.

IcySunset: Take your mind off him? As if…none of us will ever be cured of him…yay! (That's a good thing.)

Phoenixthemenace: The living in the lake was sarcasm. Though I'm sure any phangirl would be happy and willing to live on a raft if it was on Erik's lake.

Danica Enjolras: Hee…cool. I never really connected Erik with that song, but now I'll think of him every time I hear it. ENJY? (grins and cracks up) Does Enjolras really appreciate that? I'm totally going to call him that now. I love Enjolras. You know, the book doesn't _actually_ show him dying? He could still be alive. (nods)

Lackaz: Love Frank Sinatra. I can see Erik doing him too…I should have put a Sinatra song in his lounge repertoire.

LinhDog: No, I'm not participating. (kicks a rock) I think I'm only relatively normal because my impulse to jump on him is balanced by my awe and respect for him. (shrugs)

Willow Rose: Sure, no problem. But do you want me to start an account for you or post it on my account with a note saying you wrote it? E-mail me – it's in my profile.

…………………………………..

Erik slept well that night. There was no anticipation of a date the next day…no more tortuous phangirls. Erik would finally be able to go back to his quiet life under the Opera. True, he'd have to go with a phangirl for an extended amount of time, but it was really a trial period. At the end he could say it hadn't worked out and make her leave.

After that, he would have seen the last of the phangirls.

Oh, how wrong he was.

Aislin woke him up around noon the next day by putting her Phantom CD in the stereo and blasting the Overture throughout the room. It sent a rush of happy, excited energy through her, and effectively awakened Erik. He fell out of bed at the sound of the organ.

"Oh, good you're awake," she shouted over the music. Her energy was showing itself in the way she walked quickly around Erik's bed, punching the air in time to the music. She didn't speak again until it was over, then she dove at the stereo to turn it off before Carlotta's voice replaced it.

"Um, Erik? I have to tell you something." She was now wringing her hands nervously.

"What is it?" Erik straightened his mask grumpily, getting out of bed to change.

"Well…you know, you have a lot of phangirls," she said helplessly.

"You don't have to tell me that…potato throwers, singers, shoppers, gothics, Project Phantomers…I have it all, now don't I?" he finished sarcastically.

"Yeah, well…a whole lot more than the ones you got to date are out there. And they…kind of found out that this was your last day here. So uh…well, just watch your back around the hotel. They know you're here, and they know this is their last chance."

Erik's heart sank. What would be waiting for him when he left the room? He decided he'd better order room service for breakfast, just to be safe.

Fifteen minutes later, a girl dressed in the white hotel uniform wheeled Erik's table into the room.

"Thanks," he said, and offered her the prepared tip. She didn't take it, however. She merely stared at him. Erik then noticed the red glass rose on a chain around her neck, and the emergency white half-mask sticking out of her pocket.

And it was then that Erik realized the lengths to which a phangirl would go to see him.

She grinned and jumped on him. "ERIK!" He fell backward onto the bed, inadvertently kicking a plate of bacon to the floor. "Erik, my name's Katrina and I love you so much! I was horrified to find you weren't taking any more dates. I know you could love me if you gave me a chance – maybe you could squeeze in just one more date?" He pulled himself out from under her, shoved the tip into her hand, and proceeded to push her out of the room.

"But Erik, we haven't even had a chance to talk, come on, I just want to spend a _little_ time with you. I brought you breakfast!" And Erik snapped the door in her face.

Sighing, he went back to his breakfast table and sat down on the bed to eat. Presently, he was aware of an odd rubbing against his leg. He looked down to see a hand fingering his pants.

He yelled and pulled away the long tablecloth. It did that cool thing where it flies out but all the dishes stay in place. Under the now bare table was another phangirl. Nothing in her person gave away the fact that she was a phan, but who else would ride into Erik's room under a table to feel his clothes?

She smiled. "HI! My name's Lexi. I heard you turn that other girl down. Don't worry, she didn't know I was down here. Want to go for some ice cream?"

Erik sighed. "Yes, why not?" Excited, she jumped up beside him. Erik escorted her out of the room. She continued to babble all down the hallway, and while they waited for an elevator. It arrived on their floor, and the doors opened. Erik pushed her inside, then quickly hit the button for the fifteenth floor and ran for the stairs. Lexi protested loudly as the doors closed before her.

Well, now he was on the first floor. He ran from the elevators so Lexi wouldn't catch him. Unfortunately, waiting around the corner was a group of girls with the telltale black shirts.

Project Phantomers.

"Digimitsu, look!" One girl pointed at Erik as he tried to back away. "He took an alternate route!"

The girl she'd spoken to turned, and gasped. "Everyone, THERE HE IS!!!"

Digimitsu led the other four girls in a wild chase after the poor Phantom. He dashed with

all the speed acquired as a ghost, and still couldn't elude them. They pounced on him as he was nearing the front doors.

"Erik, I'm Digmitsu, you want to catch a movie –"

"Erik, my name's Rose (A/N: shortening of MoonlightRoseGoddess), let me sing for you, just a little while –"

"Hey, Erik, I'm Claire, let's go back to Paris and get away from it all –"

"Erik, Erik, I'm Claire too, but my net name's Goddess of the Neon Rose – let's go to a club somewh –"

"Forget them, Erik, I'm Katherine, come with me –"

"STOP IT OR YOU WILL ALL PERISH AT MY HANDS!!!" The girls all fell silent. Erik took a deep breath. "Digi, Rose, Katherine, Claire…Claire. The one thing you could do to make me _hate_ you is what you are all doing now. I advise you all to leave me alone, and I will like you twice as much."

"Quick, run away!" Claire#1 ran off as fast as she could, the other girls following. "We'll write you Erik!" called Rose, and Katherine really seemed to be resisting the urge to glomp him in farewell. Soon, they were gone.

Erik straightened his cape, and groaned. "I need a drink." He headed for the lounge.

A small cluster of people applauded as he entered the now-brightly lit lounge, and at first, he dreaded more phans, but they turned out to be a group of people who had been at his concert of a few nights ago. They raised their glasses to him, and he couldn't help but smile. He sat at the bar and ordered some wine. The girl at the bar served it to him, and then stood in front of him as if waiting for something.

"I have already paid you," he said shortly, and he looked up at her. She was staring deeply into his face with a look of extreme happiness. "I thought you might come back in here," she murmured happily. "I'm Kara…no, not the first Kara," she said impatiently, as Erik began to protest that she didn't look like the Kara he'd met. "Mind if I join you in a drink?" And without waiting, she sat on a stool behind the bar and grabbed a soda from an innocent customer. He sputtered angrily for a moment, and Erik looked helplessly at him. The poor guy shrugged and walked off. Erik followed suit, Kara looking very disappointed, but deciding not to pursue Erik, for which he was very thankful. In gratitude, he waved goodbye. Kara finished her stolen soda.

Erik figured he'd better go back up to the room now. It was too dangerous in the lobby. He got an elevator and headed up.

There were two other girls in the elevator. Erik got in warily and the doors closed. As soon as Erik was trapped, they closed in on him.

"We've been riding the elevators for an hour hoping you'd get in one," said one girl happily. "I'm Willow Rose –"

"And I'm Mystery," piped the other.

Erik fumbled for the panel and pressed the button for the fifth floor. As they were just passing the fourth, the doors opened and Erik slipped out, running as fast as he could in the opposite direction.

Too bad he forgot that the fifth floor is the pool level.

Erik ran straight into the shallow end of the pool. He floundered in the water, cape floating around him and mask slipping off his face. As he was surrounded by small kids in the shallows, and he hadn't had much luck with them so far, he was careful not to lose the mask and freak them all out.

Noticing that, since Willow Rose and Mystery hadn't chased him for some reason (phangirls were getting smarter and smarter), he had jumped fully clothed into a pool for no reason, he said some things that made the parents around him gasp and climbed out.

He was suddenly glomped from the side, falling back into the pool with the daring phangirl.

"Hello, Erik, I'm Linh," said the dark haired girl in a distinctly German accent. Funny, she looked Asian. "Want to come swim with me?"

"No, no, sorry, I'm afraid I must get back up and change. Contest business, you know, and I can't go all wet." He pulled himself away from Linh, and escaped.

"The phans would like you much better that way," she called as he fled.

Erik made it back to the room without incident, and sank his poor, sore body into a hot bath with lovely scented oils and fragrant bubbles. Not many people knew that the Phantom of the Opera enjoyed things like this, but it was true. After Christine had left, he had turned to spiritual meditation, finding a lack of love and happiness in his life had left his chakras far too closed. True, meditation really didn't help him much, but he enjoyed it all the same.

Still, music calmed him far more than meditation. So he sang himself into serenity.

………………………………

There you go. Only one chapter left! I'm sad. Well, review!


	20. The Winner is Announced

Well…here we have it. The final chapter of The Hate of His Life. I'll deliver some closing remarks at the end. But for now, reviewer replies!

Danica Enjolras: I wish someone lived in my closet. Erik…Enjolras…anyone. (runs to check) Nope, just clothes. What's Enjy listening to? (I'm forever going to call him that now.)

Lendlaer: Oh, thank you! I don't plan to stop – there are a few poems coming up, plus the sequel to this, which needs a little thinking out.

Scarlett Red Rose: I'm glad you like me! I know the feeling – there are some authors who I admire…and them they read my stuff. I know the phangirl-based fic is pretty overdone, but I (a) really like phangirl phics and (b) think POTO fiction could use a lot more humor. I devote my time to enriching the amount of POTO humor out there. You too must keep writing…I don't know why that little phic cracked me up so much.

Lackaz: We're all desperate. No, I sent no subliminal messages that I can recall.

Raveene: Yay, Hello! And crackers…I never knew Origin was limited. Kianra's first account was deleted, along with her story, so she's not going to repost it. She just told me to tell you that you would have won if she'd gotten a chance to finish it.

LinhDog: O.o That sounds both creepy and amusing. Heh. (holds up leather outfit) Hey, Raoul? Want to go for a drive?

Artymas: I can see a montage of this phic playing along with either Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again or Think of Me. Two songs that reflect the exact opposite of Erik's feelings.

Lady Crazy Neko: Sorry…I wasn't planning to make any more cameos. I'm sorry! I hate to disappoint fans. (sniff)

Songwind: I know, that pairing really doesn't work – but you can't blame us for continuously trying! Heehee. Anyway, maybe in the sequel things will actually work out. Or maybe not. Probably not. I dunno.

Silver-Eyes97: Thanks! Normally the beginning and end are the weakest points of my writing. I still think they are. But I'm glad you like it!

Elle-'Nolan: O.o Erm…okay. Well, considering you weren't actually in it, I can't very well name you the winner. Sorry. (feels awkward)

……………………………………………

Erik opened his eyes and realized it was time to get out of the tub. He'd been there for over an hour, and his skin was absorbing all the water in the tub. Plus, what water was left was getting really cold. He climbed out of the tub and grabbed a fluffy hotel towel to dry off. He then stared at his ordinary reflection.

Not many people were aware of the pains he went through to make himself look like the phantom of the stage. Normally, he really did resemble the phantom of Leroux's telling. Not a whole lot of hair, no nose, yellow eyes, and he had been exceptionally thin. However, now he wore a wig to fix the horrid hair, and he really could get by with just a half-mask. He'd also eaten more for a period of about a week to try and flesh himself out a bit. But any longer than that and the managers would have started to notice the huge amounts of meat and vegetables disappearing from their icebox every morning. Andre was already suspicious of the bottle of wine that vanished every Sunday. Anyway, he now went through the process of making himself semi-presentable. Mask, wig, clean suit, and rather scuffed shoes all took their place. He made a mental note to get those shined. Then he added just enough makeup to take away from the deformity on the uncovered side of his face and still leave him with a feeling of masculinity. There. No one could say he wasn't an incarnation of Lloyd Webber's Phantom.

He came out of the bathroom to find Aislin waiting on the bed. "It's about time you came out," she said impatiently. "You're going to be late to the closing ceremony in half an hour. I trust you've chosen the winner?"

Erik stared at her, dumbfounded. He had to pick the winner! Of course! He'd completely forgotten – he'd assumed that he'd just stroll on home with a pre-chosen winner. But no…he had to pick.

Who was he going to choose?

Aislin sighed. "I didn't think you chose a winner. Here," she said, and she held out to him a large folder full of papers. "These are the notes from all your dates, including the information on the girls you went out with and details on where you went. Look through them and decide which you want to win. I'll give you more details on the ceremony when we get there."

Erik sat down on the bed and opened the folder. Along with the information Aislin has said would be there, each girl had written their own notes on what had happened, and a sort of review of their date. Erik noticed that, according to the girls, he'd passionately kissed every one of them. They had a tendency to change details to suit their own tastes, apparently. Upon glancing through the folder and awakening some unpleasant memories that he'd blocked out, he realized that there was no way he could fall in love with any of these girls. But there was another way…one way that gave him an obvious choice…after all, it wasn't always about love.

And he hadn't played the role of Angel of Music in a long, long time.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

He finished thinking about it. It had taken him a good ten minutes to decide if this was truly the choice he wanted to pick, and he was sure now. He dropped the folder on the bed, and Aislin stuffed it away. "Ready?"

"Yes. I have made my decision."

"Good. Now follow me." Aislin led Erik out of their hotel room and into the elevator. However, instead of taking it down, she pressed the button for the rooftop restaurant. Erik felt that this would be a special occasion, and made sure he was wearing his cape and fedora before stepping out. The maitre-d bowed as they entered the restaurant, and a large group of girls started applauding.

Every phangirl Erik had ever dated was in here. Kat, Summer, Breanna, Danica, Jessica, Kimberly, Hilary, Kara, Stephanie, Phoenix, Gina, Mandy, Jenna, Raver, Kay, Mimi, Hana, Rachel, and Butterfly all stood in a line in front of the window that formed the wall, cheering and applauding. Aislin called for quiet.

"Now, then," she said loudly, in her natural performer's voice. "You all know what you're doing here. As per the rules of The Love of His Life, each of you spent some time with our good Phantom here, and each of you has a chance to spend even more time with him."

She opened her white spiral notebook and began to read. "The girl who wins this contest will go on a vacation to a pre-selected destination, leaving on a Friday and returning on the following Monday. For the rest of that week, and another full week afterward – in other words, until the next Friday – the girl will go to live in the Paris Opera House in order to be closer to Erik. He can let her live in the house by the lake or somewhere in the upper floors – that's up to him. After this two week period, we'll see if the relationship is fit to continue!"

All the girls clapped, and Erik fidgeted uncomfortably standing beside Aislin.

"Erik has just chosen the winner a few minutes ago. You're all winners in my eyes…but apparently not in Erik's." Grinning, she stepped back, leaving Erik in the foreground.

He sighed. "Well, ladies, I must say it was a difficult decision to make, but I made it nonetheless. Are you all ready?"

The girls nodded vigorously, and someone shouted out, "Get on with it!" Erik glared at them. "The winner is…"

They leaned forward expectantly.

"Hana."

Hana leapt into the air and cheered loudly, as "All I Ask of You" started playing dramatically from Aislin's stereo in the background. She dashed up to Erik, placing her hands in his.

He groaned inwardly, but said, "Even if I can't bring myself to love one of you, Hana and I sang together, and I believe I can do much with her voice. I can train this girl to sing with the music from heaven, and perhaps she can do what Christine could not."

Aislin cleared her throat. "Now that he has made his choice – Hana, do you accept?"

She stared back at Aislin. "Are you kidding?"

"That's what I thought, but it's a regulation of the contest to ask." Aislin nodded. "Now that you are together, you'll be off to your outing in…Hawaii!" She handed them two tickets. "Your things are packed and you leave tomorrow. Enjoy each other's company!" She turned to the rest of the assembled girls, who all looked very put out. "And thank you all for participating in The Love of His Life!"

The other girls monaed, and Aislin compassionately shepherded them outside. When they were gone, she turned acidly on Erik. "You know, Erik, if it had been a question of your next vocal student, we would have held a talent contest. Or you could have come straight to me." She stalked outside, leaving Erik and Hana alone.

They stood silently for a minute, as All I Ask of You stopped playing.

"Does that make you my Angel of Music now?" asked Hana.

"I suppose so," said Erik hesitantly. It was hard for him, taking another girl under his wing. He felt as if he was replacing Christine.

But wasn't that what this had all been about? Finding someone new?

The All I Ask of You reprise started playing, and Hana went to stop it before it killed the romantic mood. (A/N: Don't get me wrong, I love the reprise.)

I suppose this could work, Erik thought. I truly do not see love in the future, but rather, a bright future for the new soprano at the Paris Opera.

And Erik…now he had something more to occupy his time than painful memories of Christine.

Hana suddenly glomped him. "This will be so much fun!" she cried.

Erik sighed. Actually, the shaping of this phangirl into a diva on par with Christine could take some work.

………………………………..

And there you have it! I hope you all enjoyed reading my little phic as much as I did writing it. Review, please! I hope to reach 300 reviews with this last chapter. Hana, e-mail me at the address in my profile, I need to talk to you about some stuff. Thanks again for supporting me, and keep an eye out for new stories in the future. I can tell you now, there WILL be a sequel for this story.

Your obedient servant,

A. K. (Aislin Kageno)


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